Group Think : Overcoming Self-Hate Part II

In the Spirit of Sankofa and Peace and Love!

I happened to be one of the members of the group you all describe as being self-haters. I would think that by dealing directly with a "self-hater" this would be an excellent opportunity to show us "self-haters" the error of our ways.

When attempting to FIX other people of "problems" that don't effect you AND the people you are trying to FIX don't think they are BROKEN, it becomes neccessary to break things down to a personal level. Therefore, if you want solutions, rather than just gripping about people you don't agree with, the discourse must be personal. Not necessarily hostile, but the personal examples become relevant and very necessary for success.




excel10k,

Pardon this late response post, but since this exchange was made, we now function under "Higher Standards Required," which preclude getting personal in the discussions.

 
I've posted this as a second thread to the discussion on self-hate because I would like to branch off away from the involvement of astrology as a tool for self-love.

Now, when I think of self-hate I think of any set of beliefs, behaviors and habits that destroy the individual self, whether that is the body, mind or spirit.
I can also look around my community, turn on a television set or read a paper and find thousands of other people who demonstrate their own patterns of self-hate. I mention this because I believe that in healing our African minds, bodies and spirits that we do not isolate ourselves in negativity, but recognize the universal challenges that affect people regardless of history and color.

Now, the patterns of self-hate within the African communities may begin to take on behaviors and habits that are recognizable to our shared sense of history, but this in itself does not make it a dis-ease belonging to us alone. We can however, identify those symptoms that pertain to us as a group.

For example, the term double consciousness created by William E.B. DuBois refers specifically to the African in America; a mental state of being forced to look at ourselves through the eyes of others, and to externally project a reality that is contradictory to the truth we hold inside.

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According to the author of The Developmental Psychology of The Black Child, Amos N. Wilson, this double consciousness affects all Africans "regardless of income" and the black middle class "is the most schizoid of all'

"The black middles class, which now includes almost half of black families in America, is caught on the horns of a serious dilemma. In its effort to succeed according to white standards it has become increasingly alienated from its black roots and yet its rejection and non-acceptance by the white middle class whose acceptance it perceives as the necessary factor needed for authenticating its own existence, leaves it in a state of psychological limbo (this perception is also shared by the rest of black classes ... less consciously than is the case of the black middle class) p.54-55​
Therefore, it is quite safe and logical to conclude that money and status are not antidotes to self-hate, nor are they byproducts of self-love.

What can be universally understood about self-hate is that it stems from and is the product of unworthiness. A common misconception about self-hate is that self-love is the process by which one is healed, when in reality, self-love becomes the end product of one having healed their sense of unworthiness and self-hate.
http://www.cyquest.com/pathway/healing_self_hate.html

What can be learned from evaluating the ruling classes around the world is the sense of entitlement, the sense of worthiness. Allow us to use the Caucasian as a case in point. The Caucasian people emerged only a few thousand years ago from a geographical point on earth that was literally barren of resources, devoid of warmth, culturally undeveloped and fierce in it's environment. The Germanic tribes that we have now come to contend with in many ways came from destitution, poverty, lack, hardship, disease and violence. What many of them have acquired though is a sense that they were worthy of the what the world had to offer. Allow me to state before anyone feels heated and angry, that I am not advocating to a sense of false superiority, nor supporting the methods and destruction employed by the Germanic peoples. What I am illustrating is that while many African can claim a rich and abundant history of wealth, education, love, community, intelligence, etc... they today feel unworthy of their inheritance because of a 400 year blight on their souls and their genetic memory.

What we must understand and AGREE ON, is that exposure to external hate eventually becomes internalized, and this we cannot heal, we can only return to the source of which is comes. How we can combat external hate is to make every effort consciously to not accept or agree with the messages sent our direction.
The hatred coming from another person is actually taken in and held deep within the soul. We have called this the DarkDeath, because that's how it feels when you hold another person's hatred energy within yourself.
It is here where we as Africans often disagree on collective healing. Some Africans contend that the we are solely responsible for our condition, as if racism which is institutionalized hate, is within our control. If that is the case then we become victims that further the promotion of shame within ourselves. Others believe that we can only fight hate with love, and will advocate for integration and co-operation. And then there are the Africans who believe that the sources of external hate must be abandoned entirely for the good of the whole. We see that many of our leaders have embodied these different approaches and have all contributed to our understanding of the issues.

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We have grown immeasurably in the last 150 years since the emancipation of Africans in America, and we have unearthed and revealed the psychological conditioning that brought about our conditions today. What we can do now, is to apply what so many gifted scholars have learned and shared with us. Dr. Frances Cress Welsing advised us to stop the bickering, stop the arguing, stop the gossip of one another. Do these things in our individual lives shifts the energy in our communities and families.
Amos Wilson addresses changing our parental attitudes and child-rearing practices, which I believe deserve their own thread. And on a large level we can make the exodus away from external hate once we are armed with the ability to generate self-acceptance.

What will not and does not heal self-hate is the projection of it onto others. Blaming members of our race for marrying outside of it, for straightening their hair, wearing colored contact lenses, practicing the wrong faith, living in the wrong area codes will not heal the collective nor individual patterns or self-hate and unworthiness. In fact, the persecution of each others symptoms will only promote self-hate amongst us and push us further into the arms of those who will eventually reject us.

As Dr. Claude Anderson spoke of in Powernomics, "we are the only people who keep trying to integrate".
It is this continued attempt at integration that leaves us vulnerable to external hate becoming a part of ourselves, and it is this mindset that must be recognized and healed.

In researching this topic I came across a website that has some good information on the patterns of self-hate and the archetypes created by it. What I do know about rewiring the subconscious and other parts of awareness is that it takes some time to witness the shift in our lives, depending on our attachment to the behavior.

Personally, I still have habits of self-hate to overcome, but I believe in myself and my ability to reach the destiny of my higher self. I recognize that the patterns I've adopted from family, and society are the threads in the noose around my neck. I also recognize that the ability to cut myself free and fly far away from the hatred is my dedication to changing myself not others.

It is my sincere belief that as it was in the beginning so shall it be in the end... and it began with love....

http://www.cyquest.com/pathway/patterns_self_hate.html



This was POWERFULLY BEAUTIFUL, Sister!
 
excel10Kfullspeedofit said:
What specific actions or behaviors would constitute self-hate?

Any behavior that knowingly causes you or another Afreekan Descendant harm.
and that behavior is recurring or recurs...despite the harm caused.



M.E.
:hearts2:
 
In the Spirit of Sankofa and Peace and Love!

Overcoming Self-Hate Part II ...striving for a solution


Any behavior that knowingly causes you or another Afreekan Descendant harm.
and that behavior is recurring or recurs...despite the harm caused.



M.E.
:hearts2:




.......Well said sistar truetothecase, well said indeed.

 

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