I believe in Fate. not the magically kind on Tv.. but the kind that you make.. if your child is not a priority in your life, it will show in your child. Whatever demons (personal deficiencies) the parents have not worked their way through, will affect the children. The sins of the father / mother landing on the kids is not a mysterious biblical thing, it's a practical anecdote... if daddy is an alcoholic, then sonny will pay for it by being beholden to an alcoholic father. daddy's irresponsibility will affect his ability to give that child what he needs. If mom is unloving, then sonny will grow up without the love of his mother.. that's what it means. That is that child's fate. But it's not mystical, it's created by that child's parents actions which are inextricably bound to the circumstances those parents find themselves in.. a circumstance created partly by the actions of their own parents.. that's how I believe dysfunction is indirectly passed down from generation to generation.. Each generation has an opportunity to break the cycle by recognizing and working through their own personal deficiencies for the purpose of positively affecting their circumstances. And by deficiencies I mean: emotional, physical, mental, social, financial, etc.. but to do that each person has to have an idea of what a healthy state of mind looks and feels like. Fate, then, is created by a combination of action and circumstance. The action part, we control, the circumstances we don't control, but can affect with our action. If this child's parents don't act on their concern for the child's education, then that child will, not be well educated. Caring is not enough. Care has to be acted upon to mean anything. But we can only act on what we have control or influence over. So our theories on what everyone else should do are only useful to the degree that they motivate us and others to act. thoughts? Ideas? Comments?