Black Relationships : Meeting the Parents...

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by The Specialist, Jan 23, 2006.

  1. The Specialist

    The Specialist Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2006
    Messages:
    10
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ratings:
    +0
    Hi Everyone!

    I have a dating situation that I will be sure to share later, but I just want to get some insight from you all. What does it mean to you to meet his or her parents? What does something like that symbolize? I would like to hear from both my brothas and sisters, but I am super interested in what the brothas have to say.
     
  2. kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2004
    Messages:
    3,756
    Likes Received:
    34
    Gender:
    Male
    Ratings:
    +34
    Meeting someone's parents is an important step. I only allow someone I'm dating to meet my mom if it's something pretty serious. Other than that, I don't bring them around her. Same goes for my daughter. It doesn't really make sense to have date after date meet your parents because they probably won't be around a year later anyways. Plus, if you're not serious about that person and you allow them to meet certain important people in your life, you might be sending mixed signals and getting their hopes up.
     
  3. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2002
    Messages:
    10,227
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    The Diaspora
    Ratings:
    +194
    Meeting the parents is usually an acknowledgement of the significance of a relationship, and is often necessary to determine if a relationship will proceed any further. I've met many parents in my day, but none so important than when I met my future in-laws. When they found out I was dating my wife to be and we were talking about marriage, the entire family (immediate family) flew down from Spain to meet me. Not only did they come to see me, but also to see my parents. If that meeting didn't go well, the relationship could not continue. Since they are now my in-laws, obviously the meeting went well.
     
  4. Dual Karnayn

    Dual Karnayn Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2005
    Messages:
    1,221
    Likes Received:
    7
    Ratings:
    +7
    Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how one looks at it) I never got to formally meet the parents of most of the females I dated.
    I met some of their mothers, and only a couple fathers.

    I never got that "sit down and let me talk to you while I'm cleaning my gun" converstation some guys got from the fathers of the girls they dated.

    And back then I liked it that way!

    Because of not having that threat looming over my head of what her father would do to me....it liberated us to do all our hearts desire.
    Which is why I now see the imporance of having a father in one's life.



    Now as far as I'm concerned, I was blessd to have two very good parents....who for some reason wasn't that interested in the sex lives of me and my brothers.

    My father actually ENCOURAGED me to screw many girls, and my mother's only warning was not to bring any babies home.

    And guess what......I LIKED it that way!


    I didn't want my parents all up in my business telling my peoples around the city and down south who I'm with so I stopped bringing girls by the house in juniorhigh.
     
  5. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2001
    Messages:
    69,983
    Likes Received:
    3,978
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    BUSINESS owner
    Location:
    Da~WINDY*CITY //CHICAGO
    Ratings:
    +4,178
    To me it's a big step forward meeting parents show signs that
    this relationship is taking the next level but not always the case
    i dated one young lady and her parents just wanted to meet the
    guy that there child was with , mostly to asure her safety and see
    if i was naughty or nice

    When i took a young lady home to meet my parents was showing
    that i care and like that person my parents really never got into my
    relationships what they did was gave me tips and signs of a good
    woman or what to look for in ways it help me pick or choose the
    right mate for me.......They always say whatever you like son we love it .
     
  6. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2002
    Messages:
    10,227
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    The Diaspora
    Ratings:
    +194
    It is immeasurable important for any young man who has an interest in a young woman (genuine or not, innocent or not), that she has someone looking out for her interest and will come to her defense if wronged. That absolutely will keep a man in line, or at least make him thing twice. My wife occassionally warms me that if I ever harm her, then her family will come to "deal" with me, and they all live in different countries (Spain and Africa). I truly wish more of our women had the same, it would change the dynamics of a lot of relationships.

    Ironicially I had the same experience.

    My father never encouraged to have sex with a multitude of women, he actually didn't say anything about the subject at all. My mother didn't talk that much about the subject either, but she did say two things that had a profound impact on me when I was single (both of which I'll pass on to my children): 1. Sex is an act of procreation not just recreation, so don't have sex with any woman you don't invision yourself having a child with. 2. The greatest gift any man can give his children is to love their mother.
     
Loading...