Black People : Marriage As a Business Agreement

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by legit-writer, Oct 21, 2013.

  1. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    A lot of people say marriage is a "BUSINESS ARRANGEMENT".....Your thoughts? I am going to dive right in and say that I have had this debate with someone and he said that the way I describe marriage is like a business arrangement, when in reality,
    to a certain point it HAS to be. Love does not pay rent/mortgage, keep electricity on or fill up the fridge with groceries,offer life Insurance or put kids through college. All the married couples that I personally know that have had long standing successful marriages(30+ years), they are not only aware of the Realities of Finances and the 'business matters' of the marriage, but they are open with one another about it. Couples I see that refuse to acknowledge the realities of finances never seem to last much longer then a couple of years. That's my view of it. What are yours?
     
  2. Keita Kenyatta

    Keita Kenyatta going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    My experiences come from those who have been married 30, 40, 50 years and more...and here's what I have learned. The first problem is with one's definition or understanding of this concept that we call LOVE. What is it? How do we define it? I say that it is a force that unites two people as one. A force so powerful that nothing or no one is more important than that union. My job, my career or even my children do not come before it. The vows, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer do have meaning if it is indeed LOVE. Finances in my book have nothing at all to do with it but indeed are a part of it if they are indeed working, sharing, living and breathing their Love as ONE. The main key therefore becomes, HAVE THEY TRULY UNITED AS ONE? If they have not, then they are nothing more than two INDIVIDUALS who have taken vows instead of living them.

    Hetep Sis!!
     
  3. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    In that the overwhelming majority of breakups and divorces are over money, yes. Though it is suppose to be deeper than that. GOD helps the spouse that jacks up the family cash. Brother put his wife of 30 years out because she thought it was he right to gamble up $300 a night in the casino with her friends.





    ..
     
  4. Gracious

    Gracious Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    OK My Sista', legit-writer ...here's how I see it:)!

    I agree with you 100% or maybe 90% with a few more questions ...

    :thinking:

    How did they come to that point of agreement - that openness??? Hmmm??? Did they start out that way? My guess is ... not necessarily. At some point wouldn't the "Friends-factor" have had to kick-in! Actually "caring" about the other person enough to be "empathetic" towards them. Being selfless enough to put yourself in the other person's position so that compromise is the only option!

    Now, I know - I know - I know that it is widely accepted in various surveys, text books & polls, that finances seems to kill many, many marriages ...

    Yet ....

    Surprisingly, MONEY appears never to be the core issue with couples! Nope!!! ... it usually appears as a symptom to a deeper issue!
     
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