Times changing unrealistic plans fading a family now creating tension in the air as goals are abandoned and we try solidifying without sacrificing our lives and splicing together two when one was hard enough to get done and there is no longer an option to run everyday pushing my nose to the grind and i have the presence of mind to be blind while he tries to decide how this will unwind irregardless, our lives are forever intertwined although tangled seems more appropriate when it comes to the confused mass we emit when both of us back off refusing to commit our child already a member of banana splits all before he takes his first breath and they tell me to stay calm and rest but these thoughts are my unwelcomed guests and I detest being this obsessed when you know. . .you didn’t ask for the blood test one third of all children are born to mothers unwed looking after children long after their fathers fled jumping from our warm sleigh beds after only a single dose of the daily doldrums of dread that we woman constantly have hung over our heads how is our son supposed to learn to be a man from a decoy how is it that you are still underemployed still playing with toys when we need the real mccoy you are such a mama’s boy here i go getting all annoyed when we should both be overjoyed. we are bringing into this world a little man so while i am choosing between pension plans and thinking of trading in my car for a minivan why is it your still figuring out how you fit into the game plan? We need you to step up and get ready to bat you keep picking and poking at all that we are and of course we’re gonna fall flat i understand what you’re saying, i just don’t buy that we knew eachother and where and what we have always been this is not something that can be baptized away like original sin my thick skin is quickly wearing thin it is me, your love, holding our child deep within. Standing in front of you I pledge you my spirit and soul whether we have a Jordan James or a Jordan Nicole so much of what i need is now not in my control i need you to take over and make the three of us whole.