Black Relationships : Live-In Girlfriends Unhappier, Have Lower Self-Esteem Than Wives?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Amnat77, Apr 15, 2011.

  1. Amnat77

    Amnat77 Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Dec 11, 2006
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    UK..not for long
    +2,620 / -2
    A study has found that live-in girlfriends are unhappier in their relationships than married women. Researchers suggest the unhappiness is caused by feelings of pity, low self-esteem and that they’ve violated the “norm.”

    Here’s what The Telegraph had to say:

    “The study of 22,000 people from around the world found that British women who cohabited with men before they were married were slightly unhappier than married women, and that the most likely reason was because they had “violated” normal behavior and had to endure disapproving glances.

    The researchers also claimed that one of the possible reasons they were unhappy was because they were “pitied” for failing to persuade their man down the aisle, and they had low self-esteem.

    Countries with a strong, traditional view of marriages, such as America, Bulgaria, Brazil and Mexico were places where the correlation between cohabiting and unhappiness was strongest. Women in places with a relaxed outlook, such as Netherlands and Scandinavian countries were equally happy if they were married or cohabiting.”
  2. Proverbs31Woman

    Proverbs31Woman Be kinder than necessary! MEMBER

    May 15, 2010
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    +876 / -0
    Not convinced

    A couple of points from the study give me pause. First, it's a far stretch to say that America has a strong, traditional view of marriage, so right there I'm doubting the validity of this study. Next, the unhappy women of cahabitating relationships, their feelings could be from a variety of dynamics, not solely because they're unmarried; not to mention, there are many unhappy, married women (oops, did I say that). If a woman moves in with underlying intentions, well that is a set up for unhappiness. In my opinion, many women and men alike use living in together as a tool to improve finances, self-esteem, appearances, and fringe benefits (to name a few)...focusing on the immediate advantages. In addition, there are many couples who never intended to marry, but later have a child(ren) and the woman's position changes, but HIS doesn't, nevertheless, he willingly moves in to maintain the relationship, never intending to marry, tsk, tsk, tsk. To end, this study appears to have many gaps in it...I'm simply not convinced.