So post jokes here. Shopping Center Time Killers > Fourteen Things to do at a department store while your > spouse is taking his or her sweet time: > > 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put > them in people's carts when they > aren't looking. > > 2. Set all the alarm clocks in house wares > to go off at 5 minute intervals. > > 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor > to the rest rooms. > > 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her > in an official tone,' Code 3 > in house wares',...and see what happens. > > 5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a > bag of M&M's on lay away. > > 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a > carpeted area. > > 7. Set up a tent in the camping department > and tell other shoppers you'll > only invite them in if they bring pillows > from the bedding department. > > 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, > begin to cry and ask 'Why can't > you people just leave me alone? > > 9. While handling guns in the hunting > department ask the clerk if he knows > where the anti-depressants are. > > 10. Dart around the store suspiciously while > loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'. > > 11. In the auto department practice your > Madonna look using different size funnels. > > 12. Hide in the clothing rack and when > people browse through say 'PICK ME! > PICK ME!!!!!!' > > 13. When an announcement comes over the loud > speaker assume the fetal position and scream > "NO! NO! It's those voices again!" > > and last but not least, > > 14. Go into a fitting room and yell real > loudly, 'Hey! We're out of toilet > paper in here!'