Black Jokes Humor : just a funny or two or three

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by bienamor, Dec 10, 2004.

  1. bienamor

    bienamor Banned MEMBER

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    When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee
    elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular
    ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of
    being behind schedule.

    Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming
    to visit. This stressed Santa even more.

    When he went to harness the reindeer, he found
    that three of them were about to give birth and two
    had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where.
    More stress.

    Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the
    boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys.

    So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a
    cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to
    the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden
    the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his
    frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot,
    and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over
    the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and
    found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom.
    Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa
    trudged to the door.

    He opened the door, and there was
    a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The
    angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa.
    Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for
    you. Where would you like me to stick it?"

    And so began the tradition of the little angel on
    top of the tree

    =========================================================

    A husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop and with them are their
    nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes.

    When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and
    nine kids are able to fit on to the bus. So the husband and the blind
    man decide to walk.

    After a while the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of
    the blind man as he taps it on the side walk and says to him: "Why don't
    you put a piece of rubber at the end your stick? That ticking sound
    is driving me crazy!"

    The blind man replies: "If you'd put a rubber on the end of YOUR
    stick, we'd be riding the f..ing bus, so shut the hell up!"

    ==========================================================

    Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:
    1. All the DNA is the same.
    2. There are no dental records.
    thats why Rednecks don't get too upset when they divorce: after all, they still cousins
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    LMBO........................wild here
     
  3. DivaWithTude

    DivaWithTude Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    hahaha u went their. Too funny hahaha
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Three very funny jokes. Thanks for the laughs!
     
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