- Feb 15, 2006
- 10
- 1
It was Just my Imagination
I KNOW I hated him, maybe it wasn’t so much for the actual relationship they were in, but because of the love affair that they had in deep corners of my imagination. These Nostalgic walks in the park he would take her on blind folded; just so her senses would take in what her sight would block from her memory or maybe it was the passionate sex when he would grab her sweaty breasts and put her in inconceivable positions only tantric sex books could describe or just maybe it was the in-depth conversations they would have in my head about absolutely everything and those awkward moments when they would turn around to look at me as if I were ease dropping.
For some reason they always had great conversations in my head. I never pegged him out to be one of those simple type of guys, in my mind he was four times more intelligent as me. Can you believe that? In the place where I create my own reality he was more intelligent than I was. They’d always talk about the stuff that captivated you way passed bed time hours. You know…they had those, “I gotta be at work at 8 in the morning, but it’s okay that it’s 4:28 because this conversation exist outside of space and time” type of conversations that she couldn’t have with me because $6.00 an hour only covered half of the month worth of pre paid minutes on my cell phone.
Date #1,357
Tonight I sat in front of my computer just loungin’ around on yahoo and burning a new CD. I was downloading the perfect mix of pain and disdain as if I would one day play it back to her so she could listen to everything I was feeling at the moment. She, on the other hand was making sure her bra for the evening matched everything she was wearing; just in case there was an opportunity to seductively show it to her boyfriend. “Whassup,” she asked, “I’m not ready yet, pick me up in about 15 minutes, I’m not dressed yet.” She giggled for a minute. “No you can’t watch me dress! Just be here in 15.” That’s not how most of their dates start off, but for some reason tonight is special. She shaved her legs until she thought she was rubbing her blade against silk; her dress accentuates her curves, not in a smutty way but almost if it was tailor fit from scratch for her. What gave her intentions away was the scent of wild indigo body spray, and her pair of burnt orange high heel’s she grabbed out of the shoe box from the top of her closet. Maybe I was delusional but to me she put the three or four articles of clothing she did plan on wearing tonight as if her eyes were telling me, “Yeah, I plan on making love with him tonight.”“Hey you ready,” he asked as he was walking her to the car. “Yep,” she replied. She plopped right in his passenger’s seat. She was comfortable; I could tell because she wiggled her back against the leather seats and adjusted the seat to her height right before she kissed him.
I’d like to say they spent the evening at some quaint restaurant on the west end and listened to some amateur comedian, I’d even like to tell you they went to see a new release movie at the theater and they shared a conversation and coffee at the star bucks across the street before he took her back to her door step and kissed her goodnight. BUT I CAN’T.
He took her to a park outside of the city limits. It had a telescope right next to a raggedy swing set that looked like it was about to be condemned. He walked her right next to the telescope and told her, “I wanted to give you the world, but I settled and brought you a star to remember me by.” He pointed to the framed certification of a star with her name on it. She hopped up in his arm’s straddling him and started passionately kissing him. Holding her back he laid her on the blanket, and knocked down the telescope.
I can’t really remember what happened next. All I could remember was thinking, “****…I wish I’da thought of that.”
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