Black People : It ain't just Black Women...

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by Thandiwe, Aug 2, 2002.

  1. Thandiwe

    Thandiwe Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    just for Kemetstry....well not just Kem.

    a black coworker confided in me recently. He has been bothered for a couple weeks about his girlfriend of 4 and 1/2 years. and yes, HE stressed the 1/2 year. LOL

    he and his girlfriend had been having problems, arguing alot. he suggested they take alittle time so they could find some peace. well she ends up getting involved with and having sex with another guy, only after two weeks they are doing things that he built up to in their 4 years together. my coworkers, obviously, is upset, heartbroken.

    well it turns out that she is a white woman, her parents adore him and his aunt who he says is a "prophet" tells him to stay with the woman because she will need him. so nevermind that this is the second time she has cheated on him. he seems to be a nice, southern gentleman type of guy, he calls me "ma'am". (****, am i that old?) anyway he's college educated, has goals, works with children, etc.

    he is orginally from houston but now here in Minnesota he is experiencing the attention white women give the black men here (and elsewhere. not that this is anything new...)

    he says how he met this woman: he and another black male are out at a club known for the aggressiveness of white women. in fact, many of us black woman long ago stopped going because not only were the white women disrespecting us but the black men allowed it. he is new to town and uncomfortable at first until his black male friend tells him, "it's cool man".

    well this woman will not stop seeing the other guy. he has three children but three different women, young and interracial.

    recently he says he ran into his ex, at HER parent's house. I asked him what was he doing at their house? he said they told him to keep in contact. i told him i would be upset if i broke up with him and then see him at my parents' house. but then i asked if he was really over her. he is not.

    i was disappointed in him for several reasons, including being with a white girl. he's a professional, attractive, charming, and has been taking care of this girl, paying rent and such. he's 26, she's 22.

    i'm also disappointed because he's still trying to win back a woman who cheated on him twice. i told him that i tell him like i would tell one of my female friends, "she's not the one".

    he admits to being disgusted by the things she has told him about her sex with the other guy. he admits that he thinks of her as being a whore, though he didn't use that word.

    he asked me why i was bothered by black men and white women because God allows them to procreate. I told him that though that is true, he is letting a white woman abused and misused him when he could have seeking a good black woman.

    i did emphasis that it wasn't about black and white. but that i thought he was deserving of someone who wanted his love.

    soooo, Kemetstry, men set themselves up too. ;)
     
  2. Mike Ramey

    Mike Ramey Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You need to invite the brother here!

    Hello T Lady: Mike Ramey here!

    That brother is messed up, but he can choose to hit the bricks if he wants to. The sad thing is, it may take him a looooong time to realize that he has been 'played'.

    Let him drop by here at Destee's forum, and we'll put the truth out there for him to sample. But the bottom line is:uzi: HE is going to have to want to deal with this 'weakspot' in his life.

    Like I told a sister one time, who had two babies by two different men, and complained: "I can't find a good man"..."Sister, it sounds like you managed to find two...TWICE!

    We ALL have the right to be 'young and stupid', but, hopefully we'll out grow it...before our ignorance KILLS us.

    Mike Ramey
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    SURELY HE'S ON A PATH OF SELF DESTRUCTION!!
    HER FAMILY KEEPIN HIM ABOARD TO BRAND HIM
    HE NEED TO WAKE UP TO THE LIGHT BEFORE HIM
    AND SEE HE'S BEING MADE A FOOL OUT OF TRUELY
    IT SEEM LIKE SHE ONLY WANTED TO DIP IN THE CHOCOLATE
    HER HEART IS NOT OF LOVE BUT FOOLISHNESS
    EVEN ONE'S HEART IS BROKEN AND DA PAIN IS SHARP
    WALKING AWAY WIT A NO RETURN TICKET WILL HELP
    HIM IN A DEEPER THOUGHT FORTH DA WOMAN IS NOT
    OF HE BUT TO DE THRONE HIS MANHOOD ONE MUST
    COME TO TIRMS AND SEE THAT DA HEART HEELS IN TYME
    AND HAPPINESS AWAIT HIM FROM ROUND DA CORNER
    LET HER CHEATING *** GO HEAD ON !
    HE NEED SOME FAITH HIS MIND IS MESSED UP AT DIS POINT
    TELL HIM TO FALL TO HIS KNEES AND ASK god TO GUIDE HIS
    THOUGHTS HIS HEART AND HIS FEET IN THE RIGHT PATH

    FURTURE .........UNCLEAR HEADED FOR DESTRUCTION!!!!!
     
  4. Thandiwe

    Thandiwe Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    well he might be able to do that....

    Hey Rich!
    Welcome Mike!

    this woman also told her new man some things about his mother. i never asked the specifics but the guy had to take about the last 3 weeks of school off from work. he had to return home to tend to his mother. he was really hurt that this woman share personal things about him with this new man. the new man had the nerve to bring it up during his stay at her parents' house.

    he is a religious man and i did tried to stress that God had shown him, twice now, that he deserves better.

    Mike, you're funny. i've seen your threads but haven't respondes yet because i know there is sure to be some heated discussions with you, when i decided to reply to some of your posts. ;)
     
  5. Mike Ramey

    Mike Ramey Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hi Thand! I've Posted! Got...Gasoline?

    Thand, you are a Blessing!

    I've posted on that other matter! Like I said there, nothing says The Great White North like Indiana! When you cross the state line, turn your watch back 25 years and you will be up-to-date!

    Of course it hurts when the Crosstown Bus runs over one's heart on Main Street. But, don't worry. Just PRAY for the brother that HIS eyes will be opened. A lot of us DON'T want to open our eyes after we get hit by the bus!

    Oh, yesssss...I do expect some 'spirited' discussions! But, let me also say that I do respect my fam! And, if anyone else starts messing with my fam, well, lemmie get my uzi out:uzi:

    I may not like what you say, but if it provides some truth, hey...say ON!

    Mike Ramey:love:
     
  6. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    indeed sistah GOD has came upon him to open his eyes
    to reality of life and at some point he must wake up before
    nothing left but self destructional motions

    ((LET HER *** GO HEAD ON ))

    within da path he walk his true mate of love awaits him
    da doorsteps to true love in heart is promised
    da furture is now as forth he must let da past go free

    sleepless nights of bad memories will rip him apart
    seek GOD'S blessing and have faith forth he knows one
    trouble and feels one heart of broken pain
    now da doors r open will he walk in is the KEY !!!!!!!!!

    hummmm ! i wonder coz so many tymes i've seen this and the
    choices made ......out look helpless if not found in time.
     
  7. UbZoRbShUn

    UbZoRbShUn Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    ahhh hell nawl

    that's jacked up..... homeboy needs to get a grip and realize that she is no longer interested in him. I mean she threw away 4 and 1/2 yrs in a span of 2 weeks.... makes me wonder if she wasn't already tippin out on your friend. As far as the cheating thing goes errybody deserves a second chance,but it seems like to me this relationship is not worth it. As far as the aunt saying homegirl will need homeboy in the end....schyt dude don't need any diseases that chick may bring back to the relationship. Now as far as the black/white issue goes.... I mean you like who you like and that's nothing you can do about it. Now yo boy needs to get a grip and stop going to that girls parents house. I don't care if they do like him. As soon as he cut all ties and I mean all ties he will eventually get over it, but ifn he still seeing the parents, got her pictures up and all that. brotha gone stress himself out.

    Just ma 2 cents worth

    One
     
  8. dnommo

    dnommo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    okay, can i jump in?

    First the young man needs to wake up and realize that there is much more in life for him than one who doesn't seem to be too concerned about him. If it only took a fews weeks for her to sleep with another man AFTER breakup then it is possible she was very close to doing it DURING the relationship. He needs the count his blessings.

    Second, if his aunt sees him as a prophet, then she should have him seek GOD for the answer not man. A prophet speaks "Thus sayeth the Lord..." therefore if he is such a strong rooted man of God then he should not need to seek the wisdom of another. Also, his belief system should grant him the wisdom to see this woman is not all that he would like for her to be. She is a "desire of his heart" which can decieve him.

    I wish the best for him but he needs to return to his first love...GOD, and allow his walk to dictate his next step, not his heart...

    Hope this helps...

    Also, i do agree with the other comments as well...
     
  9. Mike Ramey

    Mike Ramey Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Dnommo! You've Hit It!

    Man, this was as smooth as a Tiger Woods shot coming off the tee on the 18th!

    Sadly, we have a LOT of people who go to church, and don't go expecting to watch the Lord work! Folk ARE too wrapped up in what man thinks, rather than what the Lord wants.

    Prophets these days are more prophets in name, than in power. They spend far TOO much time saying "Look At Me", rather than "Look at the Lord!"

    Glad you posted, man! Your stuff is HOT! YOU should be writing columns!

    Mike Ramey:toast:
     
  10. dnommo

    dnommo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Mike,

    thank you for your words and comments. I was writing columns for a while but ministry left no room. I have been reading your column and have enjoyed your works...

    I will be visiting again...
     
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