Black People : Is there enough UNITY at DESTEE to go beyond Chat?

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by kemetkind, Dec 27, 2005.

  1. kemetkind

    kemetkind Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm a relatively new member here - this is a wonderful place in so many ways.

    However, my primary goal has always been to do something that makes a difference outside of just partaking of the knowledge and sharing that goes on here.

    Brother Ibrahim and others have mentioned maybe a business could be spawned by Destee community, and a very similar concept was put forth in last week's brothers only chat.

    That said it appears to me in my short stay here a MAJOR obstacle is TRUST.

    I could be wrong, but from my vantage point it seems like there is heavy suspicion between members based on what seem to be surface differences in political philosophy.

    How can this trust be strengthened? Can it be strengthened enough in an online setting to support a collective business or institution that reaches outside of Destee?
     
  2. Dual Karnayn

    Dual Karnayn Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Kemetkind

    Trust is a major factor.

    You can't even disagree with some people without being seen as an enemy or an "agent" trying to cause disruption.
    And indeed there are agents and disruptors who will try to throw a monkey wrench in any meaningful program.


    Another factor is basic respect and civility towards eachother.

    We have to learn how to put our differences aside and agree to disagree on some issues for the greater good of the project and goal instead of carrying permanent grudges around and animosity in our hearts.

    From some of the conflicts I've witness on the internet I could only imagine what would happen if they were played out in real life where people have access to guns and knives.

    Trust, respect, and sacrifice are the keys to us coming together and doing something.
     
  3. kemetkind

    kemetkind Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I didn't think of that. When is the next one?

    I'm just wondering can we brainstorm some way to "legitimize" people so when we come to the table with disagreements - which you will never get around in ANY organization - we can at least have a base level of respect and trust in knowing we're all wanting the same goals.

    SOME Black fraternities and sororities have rigorous pledge process to instill this trust and loyalty, gangs do the same thing. We obviously don't have that option but it seems like we need SOMETHING because us just saying we need to respect each other and work collectively isn't enough to make a difference.

    Do you think meeting up in person will make the difference?

    Maybe people from nearby areas can go ahead and start linking up to build on the ideas we come up with?
     
  4. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Brother Kemetkind ... i have seen Brother Ibrahim's thread, but was not privy to the discussion that took place during Brother's Only Chat, but i do know a little about the trust issue you present.

    That major obstacle, trust, or lack thereof, is probably something that is present (to some degree or another) where ever we come together. It seems to be built into us, but i know that's not true. I know it is because of all the conditioning we've experienced ... taught not to trust each other, further encouraged by personal bad experiences with a Sister or Brother, and the fact that a Sister or Brother doesn't think exactly like we do. Yes, i believe the conditioning we have all been subject to, plays a part, but we also bring our own personal fears to the table with us.

    Is there any Black organization, working for the betterment of our people, under the system of white supremacy ... that doesn't meet everyone who enters ... with a healthy sense of cautiousness? Based on history, any of us doing such work, would be foolish to not be wise regarding such things. The challenge here, is to limit that cautiousness to a healthy level for the growth of the organization. Limiting it in such a way, as to not throw out the baby with the bathwater. How much experience do each of us have, in determining who is for or against us, while actually having any amount of real control in managing it? For those who have this type of experience, i'm sure you'll agree, it's not the easiest thing to do.

    There have been a few times over the years, where a Member's identity, agenda, etc., have been wrongly questioned. It has happened, and i'm sure it will happen again. For some, this is the first time they've had the opportunity to come together under a roof that houses so many diverse, intelligent, opposing, and sound arguments regarding issues we've all pondered. This alone will cause us to question whether we can trust someone. For example (and there are many, but this one easily illustrates what i'm saying), how can a Muslim truly trust a Christian, and vice versa? This is what we're taught. Sisters and Brothers, their foundations of life, diametrically opposed. This is what is in us. So we should not be surprised when that which is in us, comes out.

    Brother Kemetkind ... for me, this community is that place where we can come and have these discussions. We can learn what another Sister or Brother is experiencing, thinking, believing, etc., and compare notes. When i started this community, there weren't a lot of places on the Internet, that catered to us in a positive manner. My goal was to prove that those who say we can't come together peacefully and respectfully, are liars. These things have now been accomplished.

    Now that this place is here, and has been for some time, i see other things we need to master. One of them is us actually trusting each other. Us being the Sister or Brother we claim to be. Us being willing to leave a little room for error, giving our Sister or Brother the benefit of the doubt, credit that they may possibly present information you did not know. Us remembering that those we talk with here, are not the enemy. Without this place being here, i may never have (to the same degree) been aware of these other challenges. This process (this community) is like walking up steps. We get past one step, only to find another there, growing stronger as we climb each one. I believe this improvement, gaining of strength, is a never-ending process. We should not let what is found on that next step, stop us from moving on up the mountain.

    What ever can come as a result of this place being here, i'm all for it. I know i've not put any ideas on the table regarding what can be done outside of this place, in addition to this place, etc., because my challenge is just to keep this place here ... but know ... i am more than willing to do all i can to help any positive effort initiated from our home.

    This topic, trust, is like so many others that i try to be. I try to be trustworthy. I try to present myself in a manner that makes it easy for people to trust me. I try to be real, honest, and carry myself in such a way that every Member knows, they can trust me. I put my whole heart on the table, everything out in the open, in an effort to facilitate the trust you speak of. I give a certain amount of trust, to every Member that joins us. I trust what they tell me. Once i find out that trust has been violated, it is no longer given. Fortunately for me, that hasn't happened often. This returns me to my often said comment, it all begins with self.

    I'm no expert at creating trust. I don't know how to make it be present for every single person, other than suggest, that every single person be truthful and trustworthy. As i type this, i'm wondering about those organizations before us, or that are going on right now, and mastered this trust issue. How did they do it? How did the UNIA, NOI, BPP, BLA, etc., overcome the issue of trust within their organizations?

    Much Love and Peace.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  5. kemetkind

    kemetkind Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I second that. I was thinking the same thing earlier today. I know words would definitely be chosen more carefully when you close enough to be touched up. I guess the trick is figuring out how to instill that same feeling on the net...or better yet having a method we could know the difference between an instigator who should be ignored and a fellow brother who is willing to work towards the same goals we are...maybe I'm the one being unrealistic on this one.
     
  6. Dual Karnayn

    Dual Karnayn Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Destee

    Personally speaking, as adamant as I am on certain religious and moral issues, religion is NO ostabtacle what so ever for me when it comes to working with individuals.

    I've met many other Muslims who've given me a hard time for not following certain rules, coming from a different school of thought, or being of a different nationality....while I met those who are Christian or don't even believe in religion who share most of my views politically and we get along together excellently....so I don't use religion as a basis for unity.

    I believe in the strict separation between church and state and uniting on political values.
     
  7. kemetkind

    kemetkind Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Truly a beautiful response. I've looked around - you've been holding this ship down for quite a long time and I can only imagine the energy, sacrifices and wisdom that must've gone into making it work.

    I salute you sister Destee - if there is such a thing as a web community with a guiding matriarch you are her.

    I don't have any answer to the unity question, especially for a community organized online. Seems like a concentration of powerful minds here - surely we can come up with something.
     
  8. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    Trust is the deep gap between us but i'm sure if each body hold
    an trustworthy mind and heart we could close the gap in the bridge
    we have to unify ourselves and believe in the next brutha or sista .

    Not everyone will bend to that concept or feel that way for trust is huge.
     
  9. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Brother Kemetkind ... such a kind thing for you to say ... thank you, i'm honored ... :love:


    It's been mentioned in this thread a time or two, suggesting that our meeting in person will somehow provide a guarantee that we can't be done, that our trust won't be violated. If that were true, all of the organizations before us ... before the Internet ... would not have had this same challenge. Often, such things are only revealed with the passing of time.

    The thing about trust, is that there are no guarantees. If someone wants to violate your trust, they're gonna do that. All that is required is time. You don't have to do anything, to make someone be their own self. I do think though, that hard evidence is required to bring a case. Suspicion alone, is not enough. That's what they do to us, we don't need to do it too.

    My request to the Family is ... if you can't trust anyone else, please trust me. Trust that i'd not let anyone remain in our midst, if i believed for one minute, they meant us harm. Trust that i hear your concerns, and am watching, giving every Member the same consideration i'd give you.

    Uniting is our goal, which we are doing, and must be kept in the forefront of our thoughts.

    Brother Kemetkind ... again, thank you for the kind words.

    i love yall and i trust us! :love:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  10. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    A good saying , if you wash cloths and leave them wet they will
    drip all over the place but if you ring them out they will become dry

    I believe there is more then enough here once we learn to respect
    each other in many ways to name.

    I say yes it is , the true question is how many are willing to do that ?
     
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