Black Relationships : Is it wrong not to date someone because he/she has kids?

Is it wrong not to date someone because she or he has kids?

  • yes

    Votes: 13 19.1%
  • no

    Votes: 51 75.0%
  • I donot know

    Votes: 4 5.9%

  • Total voters
    68

Nfant_De_Milieu

Well-Known Member
REGISTERED MEMBER
Jan 21, 2003
144
0
I just want to get some feedback on what you think about not wanting to date someone because he or she has kids. Do you think it is wrong? You have no kids but the other person has some or 1. Constantly, my uncle tells me to find a sistah with no kids because there are plenty of sistahs out there without kids. I have dated plenty of sistahs with kids though. We all know of the baby momma/daddy drama that can go along with kids.
 
I guess I'm somewhat confused on this question. What is the issue about dating someone with or without children? Your uncle has one opinion but what exactly does he base his opinion on OTHER than the fact that there are plenty of sistahs out there without kids?

I'm not sure I know about all the baby momma/daddy drama that can go along with kids. Maybe I'm feeling a generational gap or maturity gap when it comes to that. Maybe some others can help you with that issue.

But, to answer your question, plain and simple...No, I don't think it's wrong to not want to date someone with children. I don't see a right or wrong about that either way. What I do see is that it's best to stay away from situations that you know you're not comfortable with. So no matter how physically attractive someone is, if they cause you to compromise your principles, it's best you don't go there.

mho.
 
I think it's sololy up to you and how you would feel about it
surely there is nothing wrong with dating a male or female
with children or a child as to someone single with no children
if you care and or love to really get involve with this person
then surely you would accept the facts of children in the relationship i have dated many in my life with kids and it's been
nice but everyone not the same it's up to what you feel about kids or like kids .....go with your own feelings about it .
 
No. I try not to date people with young children.

I think that if you meet some one nice and they have kids it can be disappointing. I don't really know how to explain why, but I would imagine it is a mixture of jealousy and selfishness. I've dated men with kids and there were always issues with the children getting attached to you and the relationship ends with the parent or the kids never really take to you and that can cause a rift in the relationship as well.

As a person who made the "right" choices in life, I am looking to settle down with someone who is in a similar situation as mine. Who wants to enter into a business relationship with a partner who's output far exceeds his/her input--feel me. I feel awful feeling this way (reducing love to a matter of money), but it is the reality of capitalism. I have friends that have children and I see how expensive the little bundles of joy can be. I just can't see me being cool with family money going elsewhere. If we make a bill together that is fine, but a baby is a big expenditure that I am not sure I would agree with if given the opportunity to make a decision ahead of time.

In all fairness to parents, single people that know they are prone to discriminate should make that decision before felling become involved.
 
Nfant_De_Milieu said:
I just want to get some feedback on what you think about not wanting to date someone because he or she has kids. Do you think it is wrong? You have no kids but the other person has some or 1. Constantly, my uncle tells me to find a sistah with no kids because there are plenty of sistahs out there without kids. I have dated plenty of sistahs with kids though. We all know of the baby momma/daddy drama that can go along with kids.



I have a four year old boy. It takes a very strong black man to date someone with kids. How strong do you think you can be? The main issue is how you feel about an individual, would you want someone not to date you because you have kids( if you did).
 

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