Black Relationships : Is it me or is it him

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by legit-writer, Nov 19, 2009.

  1. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Me and this guy have been together for a couple of months, but before we have declared ourselves as even being exclusive, I have told him that I will be moving to another city 4 hours away) and he look at it as leaving him behind. but I explained to him that I'm going where sucess is (good education). I thought we have come to an understanding, but it seems that every since I have told him about me moving, things have just made a turn for the worse. It used to be that we used to talk a lot, and now he has this attitude of "I got things to do and everything doesn't revolve around you". And before I moved, I used to drive over to see him, and it seems that we have been getting into frequent arguments, and he impies that it's my fault and that he doesn't want drama.

    And now, he has gotten into the habit of not calling me like he used to or he would say he would call me, but he doesn't. And like I said, when I asked him why he never bother to call me these days he says that it doesn't revolve around me, when I don't even think that way. And that times we do talk, he doesn't say very much like he used to, and I just get the feeling he isn't telling me things that's on his mind. I still come to the city i am moving from twice a week becauase of school so I have been trying to make arrangments to see him but he just give me the idea that he doesnt care and I feel that I am not going to waste my gas money on someone who doesn't even bother to keep in touch. I am just worried that we are growing emotionally apart since I have now moved, and now I feel like I cannot share with him my concerns because he will either take it as nagging or it will spark an argument I just don't feel supported by him at all.... by the way, I am 26 and he is 36. What should I do?
     
  2. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    :geek:move on.....
     
  3. MRS. LADY

    MRS. LADY Banned MEMBER

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    It is just a tactic to get the desired result, which is for you to stay.

    My advice would be not to play that game with him.

    How you feel, and what you need matter.

    You should enjoy yourself where you are, and live your life to the fullest.

    Age doesn't matter, but if you lack communication now, why pour alcohol into that sore?

    It really does revolve around you, and if a 36 year old man wants to act like a child then leave him to his childish ways.

    We all have to grow up at some point, myself included.

    Good luck.
     
  4. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It says a lot about a person who tries to hold another from getting all the education there is to get, and then some. By the way, what do he do for a living at 36? something to think about sis, cause misery loves company.
    I'm very proud of you for wanting to continue your growth :toast:
     
  5. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    :geek:

    Four hours is a loooooong way away. Twice a week is not a committed relationship, it's a booty call. He's cutting you off because he realizes that. You need to

















    :em0200:
     
  6. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    He doesn't even have a job. I just found out he recently moved in with his mother.. his "job" right now is an artist (drawing things)
     
  7. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    what game are you referring to? explain
     
  8. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    a booty call?

     
  9. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I've talked to him already

    Also I forgot to mention that I have already talked to him about how he feels about it, and he says that he is sad, but at the same time he is okay with it, and that he has been preparing for this.
     
  10. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    um

    move on?