Black Relationships : Is It Affection Or Foreplay?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by river, Jul 24, 2005.

?

The mam who knows the difference between affection and foreplay has not been born yet

  1. True

    1 vote(s)
    4.3%
  2. False

    22 vote(s)
    95.7%
  1. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    All the hugging and squeasing and kissing and pleasing felt wondeful. Everything was going on the good. Until you picked her up by the thighs and carried her into the bedroom. That's when she started to seem unsure. When you reached for your zipper she hit the breaks--HARD.

    You're thinking: Why was she teasing me? What am I supposed to do with this hardup? Why do women always write checks they can't cash?

    She's thinking: Why is he pressing me for sex? Why do men always think just because I like them that I'm ready to go to bed with them?

    Where did things go wrong? Both partners want to progress but the man is thinking vertically while the woman is thinking horizontally. The man's mind is on the destination while the woman is just enjoying the journey.

    Is either one wrong? How would you, my brothers, resolve a situation like this?
     
  2. Chucky

    Chucky Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I think you have this reversed.
     
  3. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    if you do not intend to shoot anyone, do not remove your weapon from it's holster!
     
  4. karmashines

    karmashines Banned MEMBER

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    A woman shouldn't be messing around like that if she doesn't intend on having sex.
     
  5. Sun Ship

    Sun Ship Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    That's what they use to say when I was coming up Brother James..."if you pull it , then you got to use it...
     
  6. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    There seems to be a lack of agreement between those who are voting and those who are commenting.

    The voters so far have said that men can make the distinction between affection and foreplay while you guys who are commenting are saying that there is no difference.
     
  7. Sun Ship

    Sun Ship Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Of course the reality is, if a woman says sincerely NO than it stops…even if she was confused or you were confused or not…but I think this is really about maturity on both sides and what a woman allows you to squeeze on…:D But again seriously, There can be a lot to this to think about…if we are just dealing with the right or wrong of this, or the differences in the sexes.

    Is the woman willfully directing you to play with her genitals as she receives orgasms and so forth and then when you make a move toward sex, she’s already got her goodies and now she says, HALT!? …that’s sort of disingenuous…

    Are you over pushing it (not force!) a tad bit beyond her wiliness or desire to go that far at that time?

    I think a mature woman respects a man’s nature more and is more knowledgeable about men sexuality. Most times they will be a lot more conversive and clear before they allow that to happen and not just act like they’re just a “puppet of passion”. And to compliment that female maturity, a mature man knows that a situation like this can happen out of sudden passion sometimes and won’t “over think” a woman’s sudden change of mind. Because if a woman is not totally committed to the willingness of the moment and feel that she was just trying to please you with the actual full-blown sex act, then this usually will comeback and haunt a man down the road (be it fair or not).
     
  8. Sun Ship

    Sun Ship Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sister river, but I think what you are describing for us to vote on and the situation you explain in the initial post are a little different than each other..
     
  9. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    In what way, Brother Sun Ship? How could I have made myself clearer?

    BTW your previous comment was an awesome analysis--much more useful to us coming to an understanding than a mere "Thou shalt not." I'd like for the brothers and sisters to build on what you began to say.
     
  10. karmashines

    karmashines Banned MEMBER

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    If you are messing with genitals, that's foreplay.

    If you are hugging, cuddling, etc. that's affection.
     
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