I think that I am ready now to share my true story in the hopes that someone will see what I've been through and understand. I guess I can start from the beginning ever since I can remember I have always been too smart for my age. I was always one step ahead of my peers and sometimes adults. To most people this would be a good thing but to my family it was a disrespectful be smart. They then and sometimes still now believed that if you let it be known that you were intelligent it was a sign of disrespect for your elders. Needless to say I didn't and still don't agree with that,because of that I can remember being abused sometimes becausse of that. I was bold and I didn't know what to do with it. So from the time I was 4 to about the age of 11 when ever I tried to let my uniqueness show someone always beat me down. I could read at the age of three and I understood more than the average little kid and that was wrong as far as my family was concerned. When I was nine years old I started going to see my father everyday and it was fine until one day I made a mistake and he threw me against a wall and held me there because I made a mistake in wanting his attention. I hated him everyday after that for what he did. I told my mother a while after it happened and she was indifferent to the situation. For the longest time I always felt like something was wrong with me because I was different. I knew everybody else wasn't like me but I didn't know whether that was good or bad. I wanted to know if it was ok to be who I was and not have to feel bad about it. I struggled with this everyday of my life until I was eleven years old. That's when iIfound out that there was a place for me in this world. One day after school I met a man who wrote poetry. He let me read and listen to some of his work. I was in love with the whole concept of saying exactly what you felt and writing it down for others to see. I told him that I wanted to write but I would never be as good as he was. He told me that if I opened my mind to the notion that I could do anything then I would be able to do just that. That very day I went home and began to write, I wrote about my life the things that hurt me the things I loved and whatever came to mind. I hid the poetry in my house to keep my family from reading it. I thought I had found the answer until one day it dawned on me that I can't expect people to understand me if they don't know anything about me. I decided that I would find a way to share with the world who I am and what I'm about. I did what any teenager who wants answers would do I hopped on the internet and searched for places to put my poetry. Low and behold I came across a site that was all about giving love to people and sharing and expressing the uniqueness of the individual. I started writing my poetry on this site not knowing what would come of it. When I looked at my work again much to my surprise people liked it and understood where I was coming from. I could talk about how I 've seen things in my 17 years that no one should see, how my life has changed and how I'm still growing and somebody would get it. I find a sweet relief in knowing that there is something more meant for my life and that nothing is wrong with me. I still lapse back into my old way of thinking from time to time but I always know that I can help myself out of the situation and if I can't do it alone I always have someone who will help me. So now when people ask how I got through the toughest times in my life I tell them poetry, destee and love and support from people who understand. If they still don't understand I just say, " I found a way to blossom into the full soul that is Alicia otherwise known as soulful2006." I wish everyone here the best I their lives and thank everyione pieces of themselves with me and helping me to see that being the person you're meant to be is sthe most thing in the world.