Black Poetry : Insecurities Cause Pain

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by choclatangel, May 11, 2006.

  1. choclatangel

    choclatangel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sorry for hurting you with some of the things I say.....

    I constantly attack and strike out at you
    Verbally assassinate you
    Because I'm scared to love and be loved
    Loving you means feeling emotions
    Opening up doors which I thought permanently sealed
    Yes the love I have for you is real
    But its not complete because I have
    Not learned to love and believe in myself
    I don't say the things I say to purposely hurt you
    Its just if I don't see myself as beautiful how can I believe wat someone else sees?
    These emotional scars run deep
    What I once took out on myself physically
    Is now my mental jail cell
    I hope you can accept my apology
    Because I'm trying to change and I never fail
    A perfectionist since birth yet I feel cursed
    With imperfections that shine through in my inability
    To love you the way I truly want to
    So many times I've been told how worthless I am
    No good, a ****, how no one will ever truly care 4 me
    Spoken words affect you greater than you'll ever know
    Making it hard to discern fiction from reality
    Dangerous words have been imprinted in me and poisoned my mind
    Maybe even influenced me to make some of the bad decisions in my life
    Now I'm not saying all this as an excuse, just
    An explanation as to why I say and do the things I do
    I don't want to lose you and I don't want to push you away
    I just need time to interpret these lies and untruths
    So that I can believe they are just that...lies and untruths
    And be truly happy and give you all of me without doubt and fear.
     
  2. nevar

    nevar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    yep i think i can relate to this very well. love how you put it down poet flo on.
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    i feel ya here big time .
     
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