Black People : IGNORE feature - WHY DON'T YOU USE IT!

Medusa,

I am truly sorry that this has happened to you. I don't know the exact details of the issue(s), but it can be like tip-toeing in a mine field sometimes online.

Personally I have accepted that everyone here will not share my views. There comes a point in "discussion" that I realize I have said all I can say. There are some issues that no matter how elegant I type, the other person/people are not going to see my way. Bro James once said that sometimes you just have to disengage from the argument, or in simpler terms, just let it go.

I know what it feels like to be attacked, misunderstood, and a thousand other things. What happened to you doesn't sound fair at all.

I don't want to preach to you, I just hope I made you feel better. I sense hurt and anger, although I am not sure of how to tell you that you are valued and respected. I hope I helped in some way.
 
Sister MedusaNegrita ... peace and blessings ... :love:

lol @ you got 2 on ignore already ... :lol:

As Brother James said, it is one of the [ame="http://destee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26882"]Benefits of Premium Membership[/ame], and I will consider your suggestion.

I suppose it could prevent some carrying on, but even with you using yours as you've described, seeing the person's responses in other people's quotes, deciding to turn it off and test the waters, only to find nothing has changed ... and as a result of all of that ... you've created this thread fussing a little bit about folk who do and/or say things that push your buttons ... and you have access to the ignore feature. Based on all of this, it doesn't seem to solve the problem, totally and completely.

Yes, it's a good feature, but somewhat of a crutch I think, as if we need a button pushed, to help us control our own selves.

As you said, we run into folk all the time that rub us wrong, aggravate us, etc., and there is no ignore button to push. It happens all day on folks jobs, driving down the street, environments not made specifically for the respectful interaction of us, and we must deal with such instances in adult, responsible, and hopefully respectful manners. So why not here too? A place made specifically for positive and respectful interactions between us.

If we can't do it here, we can't do it anywhere.

You do have a point though Sister, I'm sure it would help some folk who are not able to control their own selves, but i tend to always look at the bigger picture. I'd much rather we learn how to deal with each other respectfully, fully facing whatever is put on the table ... so long as it is put there respectfully ... instead of choosing the option to ignore each other, turn each other off, etc. The ability to deal with each other respectfully in all scenarios, is a much more meaningful skill to learn, than how to push an ignore button.

It's kinda ironic, that Premium Members are the only ones that have this option, for they are the least likely to need it.

To answer your question Sister, no, i don't have anyone on ignore. There was a Member once, that I put on ignore. It was a terribly conflicting experience, giving me to know i chose the wrong option. We are a community, where I encourage everyone to take part, be respectful, as we all work to undo the conditioning put on us ... yet here I was ignoring one of our Members ... no ... that wasn't acceptable in my Spirit, so I had to undo it. I had to learn to hear and read everyone, while maintaining full control of myself, and how their words and thoughts impacted me internally. It's my knowing how to do it, that is even able to encourage you all to do it.

But it is an option for Premium Members, though based on your testimony above, even it doesn't solve all the problems.

Ultimately we must learn to deal with each other respectfully, no matter what.

Sister MedusaNegrita ... let me say too, I appreciate your being here. You have given a lot of love, in the face of several warnings, a suspension, etc., you still come back and become a Premium Member, you still strive not to curse, you strive to live up to our high standards, admitting it has not been your norm. You do my heart good. Thank You Sister. Don't let anyone push you to places you don't want to be. That gives them control of you. In fact, instead of pushing (ignore) buttons, we must strive to deactivate some buttons, inside ourselves ... if all someone has to do is push it, and we respond.

Ya know?

Love You! :grouphug:

:heart:

Destee
 
Sis, I have had a couple try to engage me in that type of conversation, but I always brush them off. Just don't allow yourself to get into a situation where you're arguing instead of discussing. I personally like a good debate or discussion. I will not allow someone though to get me into a shouting match or insult-a-thon.
Just simply ignore them all together. Live life YOUR
way.
 

Donate

Support destee.com, the oldest, most respectful, online black community in the world - PayPal or CashApp

Latest profile posts

HODEE wrote on Etophil's profile.
Welcome to Destee
@Etophil
Destee wrote on SleezyBigSlim's profile.
Hi @SleezyBigSlim ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ... :flowers: ... please make yourself at home ... :swings:
Back
Top