Black Relationships : If you know your friend's man is cheating, should you tell?

[$$RICH$$]

it all depend on the friendship and all dat i've seen it too but..
sometime it's best to take that chance surely she will wonder
if he told her dat u was hittin on him but true friends know better

i've seen where a friend went to the wrongdoer" and things worked out well and i seen it turn into a self destructional mess
see it all depend on the friendship how close u r and what's da
deal wit da mate ......well i await da answer or what was done
in this madness fashion disrespectful cheating situatation.........

 

[Thandiwe]

I'd tell her...

I would try to let her know i wasn't doing it to hurt her but i would feel compelled to tell her about my "suspicions". afterall, i think alot of times, the woman has to see it for herself, to be willing to believe it. as mentioned by Destee, women usually know when things aren't right.

however, out of love, concern and friendship, i would tell a friend. In fact, I've been inthis situation. My friend didn't get mad but she was going fight for her, in this case, husband. she kept blaming the other women for interferring but it took her a about a year to finally realize that she was better off without this man.

perhaps one way to approach the situation is when she's talking about how she's ready, you could ask her what she feels her boyfriend feels about her.

in the end, if she does get upset, as Nu2 and jh'hiad mentioned, I'd have to do it out of friendship. Later perhaps she could see the love and concern you had.

also be there to give support, lift her spirits, hang out with her. This way she will she that perhaps she is waiting time with this man. If he out there as you say, he's not spending much time taking her out. She needs to know that she is desirable and wanted. She take get that if she spending her time waiting for her boyfriend to come around.

 

[Danilyn]

N2...
I do know the guy. I know him well enough to say something to him. But he can be shady and I think he'd do what Kem said, turn it around in his favor. She's got a good head on her shoulders, and I believe to some degree, she does know, she just needs that extra proof (and no Destee, I don't have pics or anything like that ) I think I've decided to leave it alone. But if she ever comes right out and asks me anything, I'll have to tell her what I know. The funny thing is, its really not a big secret what he's doing. A lot of people know (which is why I believe she has some idea, she just doesn't want to admit it). And girls that are this naive about their situation would get mad at a friend like me who is trying to look out for her best interests.

 

[Danilyn]

You got a good point there Kem!!!!

 

[Destee]

Danilyn ... her asking you about it is a whole 'nutha thang Chile!!! ... i'd be itch'n for her ta ask me! You probably won't get the satisfaction of answering that question though (but if you do, come back and tell us how much relief you felt in doing so ... hehehe).

Thanks for bringing such a great topic.



Destee