Black Relationships : If a woman is wife material and you are not ready for marriage

Riada said:
It's your assumption that I don't like AA men. Remember that.

I just don't let any man use and abuse me.

It's interesting that when a woman doesn't let men use her, some people say she's either a lesbian or has a hangup as in "you dislike us brothers."

Is that supposed to make me feel sorry for a man and drop my panties? Nope, that's an elementary manipulation tactic that won't work on me.

If a man does not want what I want, I leave him alone. I'm interested ONLY in suitable men who see me as more than a piece of meat. I want a man to regard me as long-term relationship material, not a receptacle for his selfish pleasure.
Maybe you need to find out from some of the Brothas why they see so many of their Sistas ONLY as receptacles. I never hear you say they dislike Sistas.
in every thread you big up other ethnics while telling how badly the brothers treat you.
i think you have stated that you date African men.
i have never heard you say anything kind about a brother.
so, it is more than an assumption, it is a fact in my mind. you do not like us.
 
cursed heart said:
Now sistah, men and women use each other everyday! I see it in all couples,booty calls, and marriages!


They sure do.

There's more parity than one might believe when it comes to the battle of the sexes and how people use and manipulate each other.

I'm noticing an increasing amount of women who for one reason or another have chosen to have casual sex with a man with no strings attached.

Maybe this is their way of protecting themselves from getting a broken heart, or perhaps they don't want to put in the time and energy for a full press relationship.

For years men have been doing this, now women seem to be evening the score :couple:
 
jamesfrmphilly said:
in every thread you big up other ethnics while telling how badly the brothers treat you.
i think you have stated that you date African men.
i have never heard you say anything kind about a brother.
so, it is more than an assumption, it is a fact in my mind. you do not like us.


James, it is an assumption because it is something you think. You have no proof. It's all in YOUR mind.

An assumption is:
Something taken for granted or accepted as true without proof;[/
B]

Now the following is in my mind:

I go out with men who want what I want. If I go out with a man and I find out he doesn't want what I want, I leave him alone.

I would advise any woman to do that.
 
cursed heart said:
Now sistah, men and women use each other everyday! I see it in all couples,booty calls, and marriages!

Sis. I don't use men and I don't allow them to use me. I don't get involved in booty calls. That's not what I want so why would I do it? If other people are doing it, that has nothing to do with me.


I don't engage in casual or recreational sex. That's empty for me. When I find out that a man is not the relationship/commitment type, I'm outta there because he wants something different from what I want.

I only have sex inside of an exclusive, committed relationship. I've always been like that. I'm at the point now where I want to get married and have children, so why would I waste my time with men who let me know through their words and/or actions that they don't want to commit or get married.
 
Riada said:
Sis. I don't use men and I don't allow them to use me. I don't get involved in booty calls. That's not what I want so why would I do it? If other people are doing it, that has nothing to do with me.


I don't engage in casual or recreational sex. That's empty for me. When I find out that a man is not the relationship/commitment type, I'm outta there because he wants something different from what I want.

I only have sex inside of an exclusive, committed relationship. I've always been like that. I'm at the point now where I want to get married and have children, so why would I waste my time with men who let me know through their words and/or actions that they don't want to commit or get married.

You're right, using and manipulating the other person DOES not occur with all couples.
 

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