I searched for a Woman To give me Daughters and bare me Sons A generational woman - Carrier of my seed lover of my soul mother to my earthly existence and all I got was girl girl girl and girl girl girl. With boyish accretion girl girl girl and girl girl girl. became lesions upon my blister az$ as I chased my future into my past and committed with genocidal glee suicidal act after suicidal act upon backs both mine and beauty black raping my sisters of virgin heritage washing upon the shores of womanhood the bodies of captive slaves corpses of copulation victimization and black-queen- splotiation cause with penal elation I conjured smiles upon faces for all the wrong reasons as girl girl girl and girl girl girl sought a Man, an African King only gaining the their souls penetration by a boy who penally perpetrated as a man. I searched for a Woman not being a man at all not realizing that being blessed with a Woman required first being a Man. Fully man with accountability to God and responsibility to Man Not living life with a lustful plan to exploit or contort or resort to defining Manhood by multiple penetrations black queen subjugation and penal prowess’s libations. Drinking the strong drink of selfishness and greed and killing women in saintly seed preventing a pure thicket of natural forest lands from ever becoming what Jah had planned because I was coming dripping seeds of life causing the death of future possibilities lost potential and frustration for years to come. I searched for a Woman nor realizing – I was yet to become a Man. Wasting black seed black time and spilling commerce from these black hand for I wasted life on lucidity the lunacy of the fool in me and time, season of this life never to be recaptured for the minute were gone in 3 minute songs 5 times and day 7 days a week futility vs. utility as money that could have enhanced life de-pantsed life and every conjugal had a price tag paid for a foolish lay to play f&^k and frolic as a boy believing the life of manhood when manhood turned to fatherhood and responsibly should self-restraint would and child support could be paid by a boy, penis in hand seeking a Woman Perpetrating as a Man with my seeds fate in my hands. And I am still looking…. Because before I can find Womanhood in another I must first become the Man in me.