Quiet Poetry Lounge : I Read a Poem Today

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by watzinaname, May 30, 2004.

  1. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I read a poem today
    full of sorrow and dismay
    the poet's life laid out on display
    it seems a deceiver came his way.
    This dark cloud cast a shadow
    of doubt upon his being.
    And now, his past keeps
    him from really seeing
    all the beauty that is right
    before his eyes.
    It lies in the rose
    which by any other shape or size
    would still smell as sweet
    He wears a veil that conceals
    what his head may not know
    but his heart feels
    She also has a sad song to sing
    emotionally abused,
    abandoned
    and confused.
    But she has decided not to
    let this one song
    be the symphony that she sings
    her whole life long.
    So he runs and dismisses her,
    writes a poem wherein he kisses her,
    She broods and insults
    Getting the expected results
    He thinks she will discard the glass
    because the wine is bitter, but no
    she will instead discard the wine
    but save the goblet she cherishes so.
    How will this story end?
    The answer lies in hope my friend.
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    like da cross road of misguided trust
    yet hope is within for both i felt dis flow
     
  3. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Rich, although it saddens me to hear you speak of misguided trust, I am glad to know you envision hope for both. Thank you for feeling this flow.
     
  4. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This was so heart felt, it touched me. I'm hoping for the best.
     
  5. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Thank you for letting me know that this touched you queentswana. With hope, anything is possible.
     
  6. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sister your writing has a way of
    reaching in and stopping the beat
    of ones heart...
    these types of journeys always
    have a way of blinding one
    with dark clouds of the moment
    but the sun always breaks through
    that's for certain...
     
  7. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Isn't it wonderful that the sun always has a chance to shine after the storm? Thank you sage, your words are encouraging.
     
  8. gempis

    gempis Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm with angelicsage - you have a way of getting to the heart of things, and it sneaks up on one because you rhyme so tightly. Lots to think about hear, my dear. Wow.
     
  9. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    So much was going on with me in May gempis, still is, but June will be more about fitting all the pieces together. I like the way you critiqued my poem...thank you so much. And I hope you enjoyed your birthday.
     
  10. Beautiful18

    Beautiful18 Member MEMBER

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    this poem was felt "And now, his past keeps
    him from really seeing
    all the beauty that is right"

    really felt this poem
     
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