Black Poetry : How U want it BOO>?

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Timmytim04, Apr 26, 2006.

  1. Timmytim04

    Timmytim04 Member MEMBER

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    How you want it Boo?

    Where she takes me is un-chartered by man,
    it’s a place
    higher than space,
    it’s at every edge of ecstasy,
    it’s my deepest desire her laying next to me,
    I hold her close so she can feel my ambition,
    She’s tougher to crack than college admissions,
    first know it’s legitimate,
    people don’t be so inconsiderate,
    a strong love between two people,
    all that’s left is family, friends and a steeple.
    For her I truly have No lust,
    I can be faithful if she can trust,
    her eyes a color only seen by Jesus,
    men don’t see all that women do to please us,
    aint nothing to small to big to let pass you,
    you want a struggle pick up a bible and read Matthew,
    I Give her just enough of everything I got,
    Because she’s everything im not,
    we strengthen each others weakness and rely on each others strength,
    we try to leave each other speechless and go to any length,
    stay in the house when it rains
    massage out all her pain,
    listen when she complains,
    if it hurts ill do my best to change,
    take all night to count each freckle and eye lash,
    and any **** she use to do that’s all in the past,
    it’s just about us now,
    never ashamed always proud
    I know it’s real when she slowly places my hand under her chin,
    and I can wipe the tears from her eyes before they begin,
    no need to mention words cuz we speak in tongues,
    no coincident are bodies have synchronized as one.
    She prays for me more than she prays for herself,
    that’s why im willing to share any material wealth,
    But sadly, I havn’t met this dream girl yet,
    but patience is a virtue
    and any girls in my past I’m sorry if I hurt you,
    but I guess im looking for something more,
    a girl to kiss me at the core,
    and “I know the sex alone aint gone keep you,
    but as my equal, that’s how must I treat you,”
    picture us like will and jada the sequel,
    now let me know if that’s how you want it to be boo.

    ANy Suggestions are welcomed...begginer here
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    welcome within the house of honest critique and workshop
    welcome to destee.com
    happy you here to share and flow give love as u go.

    This piece again was written to perfection , love how u structured it
    and made life of it , nice poem showing sweet affection
    continue on poet , look to read more of you soon !
     
  3. robboy2003

    robboy2003 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It was beautiful,and if you haven't found the love. I hope you will. Be Blessed!
     
  4. Monetary

    Monetary going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    How did you do this...poke her in the eye? :lol: :lol: :lol: j/k, bruh.

    Seriously, I feel as if writing this piece was like pulling teeth for you. It felt forced. I think if you had let some time pass and then reflected on her it would have been an extraordinary scribe.

    Keep the pen flowing poet.