Black Relationships : HOW TO LOVE A BLACK MAN... LET ME COUNT THE WAYS

free2b_me

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Oct 28, 2008
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Here we go...
Im new here on Destee, and I've been reading some and posting on some threads about relationships and I would like to know from the Brotha's, How do you want to be loved? How can a woman show you love and make you move mountains to please her in return? We all want to know and I came up with a few things the book "How to Love A Black Man" and please feel Free2b you and add to this list.

Appreciated - Do not let the day go by, without showing him you appreciate the things he do for you....

Give him time to process his emotions and understand yours - One of the greatest things you can do for a black man is give him time. He needs alot of it too. He needs to figure out his own feelings before he can make sense of them. The more intense the feelings the more time it will take for him to know how to express and to share them. That's where your patience comes in ..

Dont Require to have all your needs be met by just him - The black man in your life may try for a while to be your only source of life support, but you'll end up with a lot of unfulfilled needs and he'll end up with a secret urge for a vacation away from you..

Learn to appreciate his "I love you" language - Black men have their own unique "language." It's not so much verbal as it is ACTION.... Men speak volumes of love by things they do rather than what they say. If your not trained to "hear" his language, you'll miss out on all the heartfelt "I love you" messages he's constantly sending you..

Remind him often of why you LOVE him - God knows, you've got your reasons for loving the black man in your life, but does he know it?? I mean really know-not suspect, hope, or assume? Is it his strong but gentle nurturing spirit? His one in a million outer package and xtra-ordinary sensuality? His determination? Patience? That Colgate smile? That chisled body, umm hmm.. Any of these, you need to remind of him of those things.

Dont be so hard on the Brotha's - I know that you may have a tendancy to be hard on Brotha's that you feel may not be what you are looking for in a mate. The more you stop holding unrealistic expectations of who men are in general and who he is in particular, the more you can avoid frustration and disappointment. Both of which can sabotage what may be, realistically speaking, a good relationship with one who is, a pretty decent Black man..


I have listed somethings that a women can show her sincere appreciation for the Black Man and Love him in a way that he needs love.. Sometimes, we dont speak the same language but maybe this can shed some light on what Men Truly Need in a loving relationship with a Women. Please join in the list of telling us what you need, or how can we Love you Black Man.. This not the COMPLAINT DEPARTMENT! Positive feedback is appreciated.
 
Ok, so nobody has any comments or anything to add to this list?? Brotha's, can you help a sista out here? We wanna know how to love you:heart:.. Well maybe we should invite some sista's in here to tell us how they love the Black Men in there lives.. What do you do to show your Black Man Love?? I know that there is such a stigma concerning the Black Man and Black Womans' Relationship, I thought it would be interesting to establish some dialoge. Unless, of course this has already been done, or you just dont know what it is to be loved:hearts1:???..

Well, I will say this, for my man, what is really important for us is to have a friendship and rock solid communication. I feel that, the friendship part keeps us connected to moret than just sex(although that is just as important) Also, if we can talk, problems can be more readily resolved. I have alot of patience when it comes to the Black Man period. I have a great understanding that he is not perfect. I know that he will fall short on most things, probably because he didnt learn that part from previous relationships, even though he's been with a lot of women. We expect our men to be programmed with the "HOW TO LOVE A BLACK WOMAN" manual! They haven't, so we must be patient with them I know.. :heart: Men need love too, even with their hard exterior, and caveman style.... :yesno:
 
I don't know how to be patient so what is a woman like me to do? I feel like I come into a relationship not willing to play games so to me, if a man takes up to much time responding, it pisses me off and I lose interest. Do all men require what has been stated in the above initial post #1?

Or, do some men like a more agressive type woman? I can be less agressive, it is just that I am more agressive until I know where I stand with a man. Once I am secure about him, I can calm down. Any way, any men out there, please answer the above portion I went out of my way to make sure you would notice...Thanks in advance...

Free2beme, you... I am sure, would like to add your input and I would appreciate that as well.


Thanks


Astrologer4U
 
Im no Dr Ruth but I think men enjoy assertiveness in a woman. No agression, is necessary. They love the hunt of a woman. Displaying agressive behavior in the begining before he has a chance process his feeling about you, might make him feel challenged or defensive. After all he is the man. I think it is great to assert yourself, that shows him that you know what you want. Yes, you need tons of patience with most men. I believe you should take your time to get to know each other, whats the rush anyway? I think you should allow for a man to show his interest in you, then you assert what you want (which is him) afterwards.... Well, I also believe that every man is different and it is not a requirement to meet all those needs that I posted, it's just information that you can take and apply it to show your Black Man some Love in a way that a man can understand and appreciate.. If we can get more feedback from the brotha's then you will get it from the source..:kiss1:
That's why I started this thread..

Check out my other thread I started, HOW TO LOVE A BLACK WOMAN... :deal:You can tell them how you want to be loved!:smooch:

Goodluck sis and calm down:whip: LOL

free2b me:luvv:
 

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