Black Spirituality Religion : How to get rid of negative people in your life?

Discussion in 'Black Spirituality / Religion - General Discussion' started by cursed heart, Sep 29, 2007.

  1. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    We discussed grounding for oneself.
    I've pretty much mastered that.
    What I don't know how to do is make sure these type of people stop crossing my path.
    I feel that for some reason I am always attracting people that need my councel and never a councelor.
    The energy in my home has really started to depress me since me my mom,sister and nephew moved in with me.
    I try to stay positive especially with my daughter going back and forth to the hospital but it is very hard!
    I need a place besides my astral experiences to bring me to a special place of peace.
    A place where the negative energy doesn't dwell.
    I don't feel free.
    I feel overwhlemed and exhausted.
    My exhusband has been absent from my daughters life for two years and poof a month ago my aunt runs into him and tells him my daughter has cancer and he's back in her life.
    I mean I'm even giving advice to my exhusband about his new wife.
    Why is he calling me so much telling me his problems and resorting back to when we were married?
    I don't understand where my life is going now.
    What direction and where will it leave me?
    It seems like everyone in my family is sick.
    They don't want much and they are happy being that way.
    I try to take care of my mother as much as possible but she is a very negative person and likes being sick.
    How can I get happy,energetic,possitive people to surround me?
    With everything I am dealing with I still manage to make a joke and make time for others!
    Is there a solution to this?
     
  2. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

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    Oooh thats a tough one!

    Sometimes what works for me is expressing myself in the mist of all
    the confusion. Letting everyone know just what I'm feeling.

    Other times I have to look for the positive in a situation. Focusing soley
    on that. Accepting that everyone is not going to approach things
    like me. Everyone is not going to understand where I'm comming
    from or want what I want.

    If I'm having a stressed day, I tell my family, "look, I don't feel good today.
    I got alot on my mind right now. Please just give me some space and
    time so I can work this all out. I'd breathe in and release all those negative
    energies out. I take as many breaths as needed until I feel myself becoming
    humble again.

    Once I've gained control over my emotions, I find that I'm a lot more accepting that people are going to be who they are, and a lot more
    stronger not to let their emotions become my own.

    Negative energies will always cross our paths, is up to us to decide
    whether we're going to string it along for the long haul. Positive energies
    are always comming our way too. We have to learn how to grab a hold of
    it when our resistence is low.

    :heart:

    :heart:
     
  3. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Yeah I understand completely!
    I do tell them quite frequently.
    It's hard being the weight of the family.
    Everything around me has changed.
    I walk 4-5 miles a day just to get away from my house for a while.(I've lost 30 pounds)
    I surround myself with music as well.
    Family is one of those energies positive or not that you are morally suppose to except.
    They help but also hinder.
    I think this is alot for me at 31 to handle alone.
    I am not sure how to channel my frustration sometimes.
    It comes out in anger when I address them at times.
    I know people will not be the same as me but the obvious should never be ignored.
    I say negative because it seems like they are never really happy.
    That energy is in my house.
    I can feel it the moment I step in.
    It's gloomy and still.
    Like a dark barnyard during a winter storm.
    My house even smells different.
    It's like I can smell,feel their unhappiness and it sours my stomach.
    Dealing with my daughters illness is enough.
    I am trying to be strong for everyone especially my baby.
    I've completely transformed since she's been ill.
    As far as my health goes and I want to keep reaching foward.
    Right now I just feel like I'm reaching.
     
  4. Metaverse

    Metaverse Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Greeting Sistah CursedHeart.

    You are asking "How to get rid of negative people in your life?" But in this case, those negative people are your family, and we can never rid ourselves of family unless we move away from them. Which doesn't seem like an option for you.

    For you, the best statement is, how to transform negative people into positive people. "Positive" meaning more conducive to your state of mind and energy.

    Your family has entered into your comfort zone. A place where you went to get away from the outside, and even to deal emotionally with the illness of our daughter. And now when you enter this place, forces you have no time or energy to deal with are waiting for you. Your Ex Husband has resurfaced with needs. Your daughter had needs. Your family has needs.

    Perhaps this episode was created to show you that you may be a Mother Universe manifesting inside a female body. People will always need you, no matter where you go. Its the nature of who you are. But this is only something I am telling you, you must find the truth of that for yourself.

    You have to start delegating. Give responsibilities to your Mother and Sister.
    Your shoulders should not feel as heavy as they do now. You should not have to tense up when everyone is around. You need you full energy for your daughter. Find responsibilities for them that will draw out positive energy from them. Even if its to amuse yourself.

    For your Ex Husband, there is a part of him you understand better than anyone else, again- because of the nature of who you are. There's nothing wrong with what you are doing, unless doing so is too much for you at this moment. And if so, he should understand if you decide to cease giving him advice.

    You know, I believe in holistic healing, and I understand the conditions of my hospitals in America only help people get sicker. I wish there was more I could do personally in this regard. If at all possible, seek alternative methods for
    your daughter's health. Find local healers that can help you. Your insurance may not cover it, but the very little you might do, might help allot.

    She is a dare and precious energy, with the light of your soul in her. But I can also feel her pain, she is irritated by it. She is irritated by your pain also. You have a beautiful bond with her, and she usually feels what you are feeling. Mommy you have to find love and peace too, because that will help her to heal also.
     
  5. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sis. CursedHeart...

    Thank you for posting and asking this question.

    Sitting back "listening to learn and learning to listen"

    :hearts2:
     
  6. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

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    ((((((Tiffany)))))):love:

    It is alot, but you're doing it! You're more than just reaching.
    It hard, its stressful, its even new to you, and just look at ya!
    You are magnificent! Do you realize how many families turn their
    backs on one another because the stress is unimaginable?

    And here you are doing all you can to make it work. Brother
    Meta has a wonderful idea. Put those butts to work. Let them
    help you help them. Hang in there Sister, you have reached further
    than you've ever imagine and you're still going.

    You are a Beautiful Blessing! No, it aint easy and
    sometimes you want to run. You've become the glue that holds
    it all together. That is not an easy task.

    :heart:
     
  7. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    People do seem to graviate toward me.
    I guess I always think I can fix everything and everyone.
    I can't keep thinking they will be there for me when they can barely stand on their own two feet.
    I'm trying to get my mom out to date,or maybe a part time job that is not strenuous.
    All she does is resort back to her past,cry and drink continously.
    She is disruptive but helpful if that makes sense.
    Her and my daughter don't get along.
    Neither do we half of the time.
    I think their signs clash.
    Me and her have an abusive past so at times it is emotinally straining for me to help her and she calls me out of my name because she can;t have her way in my house.
    But I do!
    She helps me take my baby to the clinic but than I have to giver her money for food,parking,gas and sometimes as a grandmother I figure she should say hey tiff I got it.
    She also complains about how stressful it is.
    Even all the crap my exhusband put me through I have sat on the phone with him for hours talking to him about how unhappy he was.
    Just last night he was out partying and kept calling me and his voice just wasn't right.
    I told him dont cheat on her because I know that's the route you are about to take.
    He said yes I was!
    I said go home and talk to her and if you are that unhappy leave but dont cheat.
    He constantly talks about when we were together as well.
    I dont know why I should care but I did.
    Maybe I am putting too much on myself.
    My sister has a part-time job since this week but than my mother is stuck watching her baby.
    Yeah my baby makes my day worth it!
    I was thinking about holistic medicine to help her injest the chemo better but she is part of a leukemia study and didn't want to introduce anything else into her system.
    She is so much better it's just the chemo is kicking her butt!
     
  8. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm hanging on.
    Thank you sister purplemoons.
     
  9. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hi true.
     
  10. Metaverse

    Metaverse Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sis. CursedHeart. You can try the forum at dherbs.com, Bro. Djehuty Ma'at Ra is excellent at giving the proper guidance for some of the worst conditions we have. You can ask him about your daughter's conditions. Its possible he might prescribe a detox like the one below:

    http://www.dherbs.com/store/full-body-detox-kit-p-1.html

    The Acai Berry that I've been speaking about online for so long, actually fights Leukemia also. It has a taste your daughter would have to get used to. Some of the juices aren't that bad. I have a feeling this will help you greatly. The research on these berries are so amazing, I'm tempted to invest in the seeds and start farms throughout the Black community. Sometimes we overlook the health benefits of small fruit.

    Organic virgin Coconut oil also fights Leukemia. In combination, with Djehuty's help and detox systems, and with the Acai and Coconut oil and your loving energy I am confident your daughter will heal.

    Research everything I have told you for yourself. Look deep into it. Find local Herbalists, question them. You'll start to feel better, because you'll understand for yourself what I already know. There is no such thing as an incurable disease.
     
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