Black Relationships : HOW DO U FEEL ABOUT THE AGE SPREAD in a relationship

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by $$RICH$$, Nov 18, 2002.

  1. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    what is the age gap u feel is o'kay in a relationship
    i've found that most females seek a older man !
    yet lots of men eye a woman younger
    now i know one guy who is well in his late 40's
    having a relationship with a young 22 year old
    is this o'kay or do you feel he's craddle robbing???:confused:
     
  2. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Hi My $$RICH$$NESSSSS ... :love:

    Men have forever wanted females much younger than themselves, and young women have wanted older men. Older women and younger men are getting into it more (openly) now as well. In the example you gave, he is old enough to be her father, but it's not unheard of. I think as long as all parties are adults and willing, no one can really say anything.

    Personally, I've never done the younger man thing but I've been seeing some real hunky, fine, mature, intelligent, hunky young men and well ... never say never. :wink:

    Nawww ... i'm just kidd'n ... :look:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  3. Kitana

    Kitana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Rich

    I think as long as the woman involved is of age, then it is their business...she must be looking for something she can only find in an older man, be it maturity/stability/financial comfort or she just may be attracted to him physically as well...he may have the whole package...although I have to say if the age difference is some 20 years or so, I wonder if they think about the future, when she's 40 he's 60 etc....I think this is when the age difference would start to be more noticable....especially if children are involved....also not to be negative about men but from what I've seen of these types of relationships, it is more acceptable for a man to have a younger female than it is for a female to have a younger man....

    K
     
  4. MzVette

    MzVette Member MEMBER

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    Maturity is definitely something that both parties should possess. Another is understanding. You have to be mentally and emotionally mature enough to recognize and be able to address the adversities that may present themselves, understanding that because of the age difference, the two of you may not necessarily have the same slant on things.

    All in all, I agree, as long as both parties are of legal, consenting age, then it's all good!

    Oh, btw, I'm 39 and my hubby is 28.
    ;)
     
  5. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    yes but at the age later in life like Kitana said how would it look
    and for him whom maybe 65 and she's in her prime surely i've
    seen the play come in coz she feel he's to old now cheating
    done unto his love he has for her and same as for a woman surely a man will cheat i've watched it happen ....
    looking down the road into what maybe
    when u see pass 20+ years and together for 30 it's been known
    that the mate still love but cheats ....hummmmm! just don't
    understand it. why !????

    Thanks all for your reply it opens up what i wonder how others feel
     
  6. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    it's true indeed i must say i too was broken by a older woman
    to learn the sexual side of a relationship and i've been the teacher to a younger woman on her first tyme
    but Keme.......what about later in life how do one see it when
    the tyme spread gets far wide and the young see need for another young one .......where do it leave the older mate !??
     
  7. Kitana

    Kitana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Rich

    Rich...it seems to me that when you have a fairly large span of years between a young wife/partner and an older husband/partner, it seems the older you get the more the generation gap widens....you have two people who for the most cases will be at two different levels or stages of development in their lives..now I know for some couples this works, but it would seem that in a lot of cases it would not..especially when there is a young active wife and an older inactive (in a lot of ways ) husband..I'm not talking just sexually but also physically and socially..for some, this has to cause problems....and I also know it is a lot different for a child born to older parents to relate to them on a lot of issues, than it is for a child to relate to younger parents..and children born of these unions also risk losing their parents at a much younger age....

    K
     
  8. Kitana

    Kitana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Kem...
    could you define "older female"...what age span are you talking, generally when you speak of a younger man's first sexual experience being with an older woman....

    K
     
  9. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    kitana when keme said that i my self was a task of dis
    it was when i was 19 i was wit a woman 28

    yes i agree coz we all know the problems that come to play
    i see it i know it ........ just my thing is why cheat !!
    i feel that the younger partner should just move on but i also
    know that in some relationship a child is within and she don't
    wanna move on but yet she makes his life more understandable
    to why he feel da way he would sometime she can cause him to
    stop sexually / physically/ & mentally as his heart becomes cold
    so cheating become a game .......why !?
     
  10. Kitana

    Kitana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Rich...cheating happens in all kinds of relationships, and personally I don't think it happens solely, in this case, because of the age difference....like in any case where one partner cheats, it is usually because they are just not committed to the relationship, for whatever reason...

    in any case though, serious thought about the future should take place before the relationship begins, too many don't take the time to think about it in the long term, and then, someone is going to get hurt...

    just my thoughts...

    k
     
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