Poetry Critiques : Hoodoo King

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Kweku Ra Hotep, Jul 16, 2009.

  1. Kweku Ra Hotep

    Kweku Ra Hotep Member MEMBER

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    Hoodoo King
    Here men have no foot prints
    They walk in spirit
    The flesh has crumbled

    Here men breath only fire
    Their hearts are drums
    They resonate within stone
    Smooth polished carnelians

    But this one is faint
    once a sentinel of the realm
    he lingers in equivocation
    A whisper of a giant
     
  2. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Great write poet, enjoyed the flowetry of this, thanks
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    you max this and need not to change a thing here ............let da truth be told
     
  4. HSF Moe

    HSF Moe Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Here men have no foot prints
    They walk in spirit
    The flesh has crumbled


    hmm... i wonder where the "here" is? right "here" in the good ole USA? this is a place where many men "have no footprints"; ie., no history. black men, native american, even white men whose ancestors migrated from europe or other places where their bloodlines became diluted and bleached and accents and names whose "flesh crumbled" into american culture. being that the "king" is "HOODOO", i would guess that this poem may speak of african american people as well as native americans? great title, as hoodoo refers to the magic which is a combination of christianity, african, and native american traditions. these men, who have literally lost their way backwards, are truly leaving no footprints and "walk in spirit", because they have no road telling them from where they came!

    i have a habit of digging too deep, sorry if i am, but you assembled this piece brilliantly!

    Here men breath only fire
    Their hearts are drums
    They resonate within stone
    Smooth polished carnelians


    okay now! the men who "breathe fire"... could that be referring to speech? outspoken personalities (which we are so known)? or the fact that we are like dragons who are themselves indominable and pursued by weaker men looking to be seen as heroes when they slay us? that sounds like the men who use to prey on indians and black folk. even some so-called "heroes" in the US military who prey on muslims in the middle east. in none of those cases can these men face us one-on-one unless we are outnumbered, out-armed, and just given a disadvantaged position. it seems that all men of color have rhythm ingrained into our souls and hearts, and even when we dont know its there, it "resonates within stone", unbroken, strong and can last thousands of years... yeah, like curly haired DNA pops up three generations later. HMM!

    and what happens to the roughest stone after the wear and tear of age, time and abuse? it becomes smooth... like your "carnelians"; a combination of brown, black and red sediment fused into a multicolored stone.

    wow, brother, you deep!

    But this one is faint
    once a sentinel of the realm
    he lingers in equivocation
    A whisper of a giant



    AH! the african, a keeper of the ages, and a keeper of the "realm"! one whose cultures and languages made it through the ages, like those stones that are millions of years old, african cultures and religions (walking in spirit) are older than christianity and judaism itself, rivaled only by the chinese, who wrote everything down! and yes, we are "faint"; barely noticed by the rest of the world, we barely left our mark around the world, although everyone has stories of encountering the african or africa: native american/azteca stones and pyramids, japanese ainu, chinese kung fu (fighting with "animal styles that are not found in china), even in my native country of the philippines, we have african sculptures that are identical to what is found in WEST africa!

    black men do "linger in equivocation"; seemingly the underclass in america, but teenaged black popular culture (dress, music, slang) is the most influential culture in the world. 3 decades ago, when i was a teen, we were dancing to dj rob base and guy, dressing in troop sweat suits, although it was over 90 degrees every day in the philippines! today, rap music is found in every disco in every country on this green earth. young jews in israel look up to a gangsta wannabe (forgot his name) on TV who dresses and acts like a brotha, sam donaldson even mistook him for a light skinned black man! LOL. yet, here, we believe that black men are in second place. faint, indeed.... the reach and influence of young black men, the most powerful force on earth, who has captivated the youth of every culture on earth has a secret weapon: hip hop culture. truly the "whisper" of a SERIOUS giant! a KING and his "hoodoo" (voodoo), strong yet subtle!

    excellent piece, my brother!
     
  5. Antwan

    Antwan Member MEMBER

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    I don't fully understand it but I like it. Maybe I'm too simple but this poem makes me feel a bit more significant. Thank you.
     
  6. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    The realm that you so aptly describe

    exists as you would have it...

    relative to our sense of reality.

    NICE POST / I LOVE IT
     
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