Single Black Mothers : Hi My Name is Destee and I am a Single Black Mother - Pregnant at 16 - Gave Birth at 17

Discussion in 'Black Women - Mothers - Sisters - Daughters' started by Destee, Apr 4, 2012.

  1. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,792
    Likes Received:
    8,985
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,686
    Peace and Blessings Family,

    My name is Destee and I am a Single Black Mother - Pregnant at 16 - Gave Birth at 17.

    I have a Son and Daughter, with my Son the oldest. They are both adults, free, alive, and able to stand on their own.

    I adopted my niece, who is now a young adult herself. My Mother was a Single Black Mother too.

    While Single Black Mothers are getting all kinds of negative stuff, you hold the future in your hands.

    I am here to offer whatever insight my experience, already having walked this road, can possibly provide.

    Sometimes just having someone to ask, or knowing someone who has done it, can mean a lot.

    It's hard raising babies by yourself ... it was hard when i did it ... and i believe it's even harder now.

    So ... for you young Single Black Mothers ... that need a support system ... come right on over and introduce yourself ... :love:

    I won't be going easy on you ... the stuff i say you may not like ... but it will be done with my greatest hope for you and your children.

    Of course you're always free to throw any or all i say away, moving forward however you'd like.

    Just know that i love you ... i understand the great responsibility on your shoulders ... and believe you can do it successfully.

    Love You! :grouphug:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  2. Corvo

    Corvo navigator of live MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    May 9, 2003
    Messages:
    3,529
    Likes Received:
    1,769
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Furniture maker, a sculptor, and fight instructor
    Location:
    LaLa land
    Ratings:
    +1,771
    Bravo...... Mi Mom, raised two boys in New York city and Brooklyn by herself. very hard to do. We both came out of that experience well enough to become responsible men.
     
  3. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,792
    Likes Received:
    8,985
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,686

    BRAVO to Your Mother ... :toast:

    It's exceptionally difficult for a Single Black Mother to raise boys alone. My hat's off to her!

    Some say it can't be done, but that is not true ... you, your Brother, my Brothers, too many ... are living evidence!

    It is very hard to do ... raising boys to be men ... and the Momma has never been a man!

    It aint easy ... but it can be done ... and if anyone needs any help, we'll do all we can!

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY for the Single Black Mothers that triumphed !!! ... :toast: :toast: :toast:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  4. MsVeraisblessed

    MsVeraisblessed Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2012
    Messages:
    1,386
    Likes Received:
    1,146
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +1,148
    Bless your heart Destee. Like you,..i was a young mother, too.

    I was 18 yrs old in love with a married man and had his son. He didn't want to meet him and i didn't make him.

    I moved to another city and met another man and had his 2 sons, but that was an abusive relationship. Why i put up with it for 10yrs is beyond me? I really don't know why, i just did. Got tired of it and left, tho.

    Met another man and we have 2 children, a boy and a girl. He treats me like a million dollar bill. I wouldn't trade him for the world.

    You're right Destee, we have to reach out and teach people with our stories. Our testimony could be someone's elses answer when they are being hurt.

    Good thread.
     
  5. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2001
    Messages:
    34,792
    Likes Received:
    8,985
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    betwixt and between
    Ratings:
    +9,686

    Thank You Sister, for sharing such an intimate part of yourself.

    Oftentimes these babies out here, young women, think they are alone ... going thru something no one has gone thru before.

    We, Sisters, have such a vast wealth of knowledge and experience we could share with each other.

    We have so much in common, in spite of the oftentimes adversarial positions we hold against one another.

    It makes no sense ... we hurt our own selves too ... and all these young babies coming behind us.

    But it takes courage such as yours, to put yourself on the table, be willing to take whatever comes.

    It aint easy ... i know ... Thank You Sister! ... :kiss:

    Much Much Love and Peace.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  6. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2004
    Messages:
    32,017
    Likes Received:
    11,483
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    retired computer geek
    Location:
    north philly ghetto
    Ratings:
    +13,745
    i was an 18 year old father.
     
  7. MsVeraisblessed

    MsVeraisblessed Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2012
    Messages:
    1,386
    Likes Received:
    1,146
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +1,148
    Bro james how was it when you had your first child at that age?
     
  8. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2004
    Messages:
    32,017
    Likes Received:
    11,483
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    retired computer geek
    Location:
    north philly ghetto
    Ratings:
    +13,745
    i got it together. i got a job. i got married. i got a house. i raised a family.
     
  9. cherryblossom

    cherryblossom Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2009
    Messages:
    19,252
    Likes Received:
    5,505
    Gender:
    Female
    Ratings:
    +5,560

    This really touched my heart, Destee!


    BRAVO! :toast:


    :jumping: YAYYYYYY US! :lol:


    SHOUT OUT TO ALL THE SINGLE MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN!

    I was not a single mother, but I am the product of a single mother. (Well, she was legally married but my father abandoned his family).

    But I saw how she struggled, sacrificed and prayed and fought for her children. --I saw how she refused to allow their environment or their situation to direct their lives.

    ....Wouldn't let the streets have her sons...(She told one of my brothers that she'd kill him herself before she let him be in a gang.)

    ....Was an example of a woman to her daughters.

    ....taught all of her children to be self-sufficient and men/women of their word.

    ....encouraged education in her children...even went back to night school to finish her nursing degree.

    ....went without eating herself but her children never went to bed hungry.

    ....taught her daughters how to be ladies and her sons how to treat one.

    ...I know how it hurt her to have to tell her children they couldn't have something because she didn't have the money.

    Yes, it's HARD being a single mother.

    But, if it HAS BEEN DONE, IT CAN BE DONE.

    And there are MILLIONS of other women who have raised their children alone, thru tough circumstances; and THEY MADE IT AND THEIR CHILDREN MADE IT!

    YOU CAN DO IT TOO!

    Don't sell yourself short!

    Don't SETTLE for what you can GET but STRIVE for what you WANT!
     
  10. anAfrican

    anAfrican Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2005
    Messages:
    3,484
    Likes Received:
    711
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    The Meek !Shall! Inherit the Earth.
    Location:
    StreetNationEarth: Seattle
    Ratings:
    +745
    :bowdown: the only saving grace of the African Nation(s) is the African Woman! :bowdown:
     
Loading...