Black Relationships : Here's Why Black Women Should Stop Complaining About the Male/Female Ratio

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Liberty, Oct 13, 2015.

  1. Liberty

    Liberty going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    We've been hearing a lot of chatter lately about the disproportionate number of black men available to black women for dating, long-term relationships, and marriage. Walk along the streets of Atlanta or Washington D.C., and you'll hear sistas vehemently denouncing the stats. Both cities have approximately 1.2% more females than males, and both are ranked in the top ten of America’s most populous cities. Even in less populated regions where women between ages 25 – 42 outnumber men by 0.8% or less, black women protest just as much.

    They aren't complaining about a lack of quality men; many women apparently think the quality factor has been diminished for quite some time. Instead, women are grousing over the far-fetched notion that to couple themselves with a man of good character, they must reluctantly bend the rules of social etiquette and actually approach some of these brothas.

    Read more
    http://www.mybrotha.com/women-should-stop-complaining-about-ratio.asp
     
  2. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    i never much approached women. i know how to do it but it never seemed necessary.
    the women i got with mostly approached me.
     
  3. frankster

    frankster Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    For me it before HS and after HS
    Most of the women I have been with, I approached initially, since leaving high school....In High School it was the opposite.
    There was a brief time in my working career when I was making mucho dinero and because of my job title and position I had to dress and carrying myself in a certain manner....women did approach me but I never got with then, Probable for the same reason I assume they were approaching me.
     
  4. JenaBee63

    JenaBee63 going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Are you saying that a women (at that time in your life )would not stand a chance? You didn't find the fact she wanted a professional looking male with earning potential more appealing? Is it better she approached a scrub? So we can't have a standard for initial contact? It can't be about how you look but we're often approached because of how we look? When would it have beenokay for a woman to approach you?

    FYI, I never, ever approach a guy first. Just not with it. I may show slight interest with eye contact but that is as far as I am willing to go.
     
  5. Bootzey

    Bootzey Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I never bought into the ratio thing. I've never not had a man when I wanted one. And if a man I'm casually dating/interviewing brings the ratio up.... I'm on to the next man.
     
  6. Liberty

    Liberty going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    The whole idea of me courting a guy rubs me the wrong way. I am thinking that if a BW approaches a BM he will interpret it to mean you are making a sexual advance toward him. Also, you have set a precedence. He will become lackadaisical in his role as a man From then on you will be wearing the pants in the relationship. For some people I guess that would be great. But, not me. I am more traditional. I am drawn to Alpha Males. And, I don't have a feminist bone in my body. I prefer traditional roles almost from top to bottom

    I did approach a guy once. And, I don't even know if the way I did it really counts. But, it turned out well. This guy was so handsome. I did my little smile thing. He smiled back but that was all. As I was leaving, something alien in me said, "Girl, you better go back in that store and say something to that man, do not let this one get aŵay. " I had never approached a stranger, but there was something about him that I couldn't resist. So, I waited for him to finish his business, then I asked him if he would give me a ride up the hill to my Fathers house. So, there I go getting in the car with a complete stranger. But, it turned out really well. He was the nicest guy. Very generous, respectful, and just, fine, fine, fine. Within six months of dating, he proposed!
     
  7. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    folks should stop generalizing and laying out hard and fast rules on people who they do not know.
    real life flows along a lot more fluid.
     
  8. Liberty

    Liberty going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Yeah, the so-called ratio deal doesn't make a lot of sense to me. People claim there aren't enough BM because of the numbers, for one. I say, there are more women than men because we live longer, for one. My Great Grandfather died at 77, but my Great Grandmother lived to be 102. I wonder if they included her in those statistics because she surely wasn't trying to find another man. And, every single woman in my family has outlived her husband.

    Then they claim so many BM are gay. Well, I don't know the stats, but there are a lot of gay women too.

    There are a lot of BM in prison. There are a lot of BW in prison, but not nearly as many.

    But, even if there were exactly the same amount of men as women, some men and women would have more choices than others.
     
  9. Liberty

    Liberty going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    I think that is what makes some women hesitant to approach men. It is that men sometimes make assumptions about their intentions being more than what they actually are.
     
  10. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    :SuN013:
     
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