Black Jokes Humor : Helpful hints???

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by watzinaname, Apr 6, 2004.

  1. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Someone emailed this to me a couple years ago...hope it gives you a laugh.

    Helpful Hint #1
    If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic! Simply
    pour a jug of boiling water down your throat and presto!! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

    Helpful Hint #2
    Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing
    vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while
    you chop away!

    Helpful hint #3
    Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms. Buy an ordinary
    one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside before you put it on.

    Helpful Hint #4
    Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish
    bowl makes the fishes eyes bulge and cause them to swim in an amusing manner.

    Helpful Hint #5
    An empty aluminum cigar tube filled with angry wasps
    makes a wonderful inexpensive vibrator.

    Helpful Hint #6
    Avoid arguments with the misses about lifting the
    toilet seat by simply using the sink.

    Helpful Hint #7
    High blood pressure sufferers, simply cut yourself
    and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure in
    your veins.

    Helpful hint #8
    A mousetrap placed on top of your alarm clock
    will prevent you from rolling over and goin back to
    sleep.

    Helpful Hint #9
    If you have a bad cough take a large dose of
    laxatives. Then you will be afraid to cough.
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    LOL ...........these was wild hints indeed
     
  3. Luver2B

    Luver2B Active Member MEMBER

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    That my favorite, it will definitely put a whole new meaning to the words "chop chop"

    Helpful Hint #2
    Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing
    vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while
    you chop away!
     
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