Well..... My husband and i have been married for almost 4 years now , we have a 6 year old son together.....but our relationship is a mess !!! From the day we got together it has been nothing but chaos just to give you snip bits... he cheated on me and had a child with another woman at the same time I was having our child so.... my son and the other woman son are ONLY 4 moths apart !!! I forgave him and I took him back ..... then he cheated on me with her again and I caught them having a "family time" on Newyears day during his "family time" escapade he didn't come home for 3 days !!!! No call Nothing and he wouldn't answer my calls....anyway I forgave and took him back....then he cheated on me with some other woman and gave me a STD !!!!......I forgave him and took him back !!!....he needed to get his immigration paperwork sorted out and I did but the paperwok and case has been drawned out during the years because I became reluctant to help him because i felt like I was being used; I am the one who paid for all of the lawyer fees and paperwork to begin with , I never stoppd the process but during my times of doubt everything would be put on pause. Anyhow, Finacially he couldn't help me because he didn't obtain his work permit and to me it always seemed a non priority for him to me because cheating with other woman and running streets was more important ! So now....he has been arrested and has been in jail for 4 months now for a drug charge, and while he was arrested a immigration hold was placed on him so he has a huge problem, because he may face deportation in fact his immigration lawyer said he will definitely face deportation if he is convicted because it's a felony drug charge !!!! So my husband ask that I get him a private attorney for which I did the attorney charged me a $5,000 retainer fee for which I've paid $3,000 of so far my husband said that he would not take the case to trial and that it wouldn't have to go to trial because of the situation anyway , the DA set his bail for 75K at the bail hearing because he said my husband was a flight risk , so I tried to see if his family could help out with a bondsman but noone could ! So that left me once again to take car of everything by myself, but I've been so financially drained over the years my resources were no way near what was needed !!!! So he had to stay in jail and on the next court date they offered him 6moths and 5 years probation which would have been a steal to the average person charged with this alleged crime However that isn't the case with him because like I said he is not a Citizen he doesn't even have his green card yet and the funny thing is he had AOS court date in August which he missed because he has been incarcerated sine May 1, 2009 .... this angers me ! Getting back... he refused the plea deal offered because he would have been automatically deported which he may be anyway, so he decided to take it to trial On August 28, 2009 they indicted him on felony c possesion of a controlled substance and his next court date was set for November 27, 2009 but before that time they will probaly offer him another deal, and if he doesn't take it he will go to trial which will open another can of worms because the lawyer will charge another $5k for trial and I've have been having a hard time paying off the first $5k !!! I've always been the one to support our family I have 16 year old son from a previous relationship and a 6 yr old with my husband and I've been the backbone of everything and everyone!!! I am very fustrated now because ther has been a few things that have ocurred since his incareration...for one I was not the first person he called when he got arrested , he called his friend so that they could pick up his property because he had somethign to hide from me which was probaly a cell phone ! He got arrested once for driving with a suspended license and when he called me i went down and picked up his property for which I fournd a cell phone that he was using to call women , esepecially this one particular young lady who he previously exchanged intimate text messages with and who's calls along with others cramed the call log ! Anyway after not calling me first, I take off form work have my sister drive me from Brooklyn where I live to Westchester county court for his arraignment on;y to find out that it was a remand and bail was too high !!! But here is the blower......I also found out that his car was seized during the arrest !!!! Let me tell you whay this is blower ..because he had this car for years but the insurance was cancelled on it because his sister insured it therfore he couldn't drive it , it was parked in a garage for like the last 2 years while he drove my 2006 honda CRV around the world with out putting gas or anything into it !!!! So it;s was a complete blower to me to find out that he was driving the car expecially since I sold my car in Novenber 2008 because payments were a hassle and I din't have a car for a while and I asked him to let me insure the his acr that was parked and noone used and drive it until I could get my own but he wouldn't he wanted me to give him my money to ket him insure the car and wanted me to make the car insurance payments every month !!! Long story short he insured the car himself in March 09 and was driving it ever since and hid it from me !!!! I couldn't believe it !!!!!!! so the days when i had to walk our son to school in the cold becauseI didn't have a car he had one but was hiding it from me !!!!!! Anyway after learning all of this in court while my sister witnessed it and she tooo thought he didn't have the car on the road I was FURIOUS !!! Needless to say I forgave him so the following tuesday I took off form worrk and went to go surprise him with a visit but i was the only one to be suprised because it turned out that he had just got off a visit with his "female Friend" WOW How disrepectful was that He wasn't even locked up for two weeks and already starting CRAP!! Any way I was angry for a ciouple of days but I got over it and continue to help him running around to different places trying to help him out and spending money that i don't have and taking the bus , train to the plane from brooklyn to westchester county prison just to see him , then my son started to feel neglected becaue on Saturdays i would leave him with my mom to go and see my husband I would leave @ 10 and arrive the jail @ 12:45 to 1pm only to visit for a hour and leave for the return journey to my moms to pick up my son and I wouldn't get there until 6 pm sometime so the whole saturday would be shot and On sundays I would have so many errands to run and chores to do beause this was my only free day because I work Monday to Friday i didn't have any time for my kids so I told my husband I will come and see you twice a month and he got upset and angry and tried to make me fell guilty which didn't work just made me angry because he is so selfish & manuplitive !!! Anyway last night he said that I treat him worst than an enemy !! How the hell is that ???? Mind you I have been the one putting like $75.00 a week on the globtel acct so that he could call and i spent even more when he first got there , and leaving him money when i could and bringing all of his packages, court clothes books , pajamas etc. and sending him packages through I-care direct , and paying his immigration and criminal lawye, lokking out for him financially when he needed and taking care all of other responsibilites he couldn't handle and also accepting and buying little things for his other son when he couldn't and just overall loving him after he has constantly gave me his *** to KISS !!! WOW I can't believe it ! I asked him who came to see him this past saturday because I couldn't make it because My family had a BBQ for me because my birthday is tomorrow and he told me "you didn't come right ?" WOw I was taken back then he said I'm going do what I have to do and you can come whenever you get a chance so I said what does that mean and he said he goign to have whoever visit him meaning his women because I can't come there every visit !!!