Black Relationships : Help, before I make it worse.

[MsInterpret]

Hello, this is my first thread and Post!

Anyways, Maybe this is all in my head and I am using what has happened to me in the past as an excuse to believe he is losing interest in me.

Here is the situation:

I have known this man for 12 years. We did not formally date, but we did our thing on and off through the years. There was always something there we were just in two different points in our lives to express how we really felt. We had not spoken in awhile, but recently we reconnected and fell in love. The bad part is that we are not longer in the same state with each other. He is in California and I in Washington state. We talk every day. And every morning he either calls or texts to say good morning. He has always told me how he feels about me and I love it.

Now here is where I come in and mess it up.

He has been having issues financially lately. So, he's become hard on himself and I know how I have been acting is not exactly helping. Sometimes I call and he won't answer his phone and then I start to think he doesn't care for me any more. So, I call or text him a nasty messages. He later tells me to stop talking to him like that and that I am overreacting and that he would never neglect my call on purpose. He has also told me that he understands that I have been hurt in the past, and that he is not going to throw salt on old wounds.
I realize I am very needy and that I am bringing the past into what I have now. I don't know how to get over this and move on and enjoy what I have without the doubt. What should I do?

**P.S. He wants to get married and tells me all the time...He really is a good man**

 

[rankin]

Greetings...

I read your post and I do have to ask... If you know what you are doing incorrectly, then why do you continue to do it?

It sounds like things aren't going as smoothly as b4, however, you've already taken a chance on this thing called love. And thart's beautiful!

There's an reggae artist named Admiral Bailey, and during one of his intro's to one of his songs he says, "You must not fall in love, you must STAND in love... "

My take is, this is the universe wanting to find out, if you'll fall or stand in love...

I hope you are aware of the things that you can and can not control. The mind is a terrible thing, when it runs wild. But there is always strength in numbers.

Keep the communication lines open as possible. Maybe this will releave some anxiety. But most of all, get abck to having some fun with your King. Come up with some creative ideas that would take some of the tension.

Hope this helps.
Guidance.

 

[MsInterpret]

Greetings...

I read your post and I do have to ask... If you know what you are doing incorrectly, then why do you continue to do it?

It sounds like things aren't going as smoothly as b4, however, you've already taken a chance on this thing called love. And thart's beautiful!

There's an reggae artist named Admiral Bailey, and during one of his intro's to one of his songs he says, "You must not fall in love, you must STAND in love... "

My take is, this is the universe wanting to find out, if you'll fall or stand in love...

I hope you are aware of the things that you can and can not control. The mind is a terrible thing, when it runs wild. But there is always strength in numbers.

Keep the communication lines open as possible. Maybe this will releave some anxiety. But most of all, get abck to having some fun with your King. Come up with some creative ideas that would take some of the tension.

Hope this helps.
Guidance.

Thank you for your advice! I suppose the reason why I do it is because of what I am used to from my past experiences. A lot of it is fear and preparation of getting hurt again.

 

[jamesfrmphilly]

it ain't that deep....

fear and preparation of getting hurt again.

it's just a man. it ain't that deep. you need to chill out.
like the man said. if you know what you doin is wrong, why you doin it?

 

[MsInterpret]

it's just a man. it ain't that deep. you need to chill out.
like the man said. if you know what you doin is wrong, why you doin it?

If it were "just a man" I don't think I would be asking for help. This is the man I want to be with. I'm seeking advice to help me to stop doing what I am doing because I keep doing it over and over. Oh and 12 years is deep.