I just need to close my eyes and focus on the back of my eyelids, find a place where i can breath deeply, and just think. My soul feels heavy, and my eyes cannot stay dry, I am drownding in my own sadness... wishing i could just get over myself, but life sometimes seems a little tough. My dad constantly tells me not to beat myself up, but i cant help but to think that im not trying hard enough. What i want in life isn't coming fast enough. So here i sit trying to figure it out, crying and talking to the lord... what's my life about? All i want is to be free, lay in the sun, and let my hair blow in the breeze, but right now that seems impossible with all of these rainy days, All i want is to be free, write and live off of the land, but that doesnt seem possible from where i stand. but lord please hold my hand and guide me!