In June of 1995 I started living alone. My mother took a job in New Orleans leaving me in the house that I grew up in to jumpstart my writing career. Two months earlier I celebrated my eighteenth birthday. My ex boyfriend called me that very day witha unique way of celebrating. I was a virgin though, and wasn't to big on the idea of engaging in sexual activities with someone I truly doubted loved me. We had been off and on for three years, the last time being the worse time. A month after my graduation, I got the call that the main love of my life, Alexander, was dead. It hurt me deeply. So much so that I didn't even realize it until seeing his body in the mahogany casket where he lay in a new puke green suit, just this afternoon. When I closed my eyes though, I didn't vision him that way, instead I saw him as the lively beautiful person I had known since the age of fourteen. I lay in my bed listening to the Quite Storm on the local college radio station, and the real storm right outside window. There was a crash of thunder and a spark of lightening across the sky, just as my doorbell rang. I cussed softly wondering who it could be at this time of night as I checked the clock that hung in the hallway on my way by. It was one forty-five. I opened my door and a gust of cool air hit my bare legs. I was in such a hurry to get to the door, I forgot all about my shorts. Leaving me in just a ragged tee shirt and underwear. Luckily for me though, there was no one there. I cut the porch light on and looked around. My Golden Retriever, Pookie, came around from the back porch to see what was going on. I should have known there would be no one there, he hadn't barked. Maybe I had fallen asleep without realizing it. I must have heard the doorbell in a dream. I stopped to get a drink of water in the kitchen before making my way back down the dark hallway. My room was semi dark, the only light coming from a fluorescent lamp that sat on my nightstand. The lamp contained a flower that turned around and around when the music box attached to the bottom was wound. I closed the door tightly ready to go back to bed. Until i felt a warm hand cover my mouth.