Black Haiku : HALF PAST DEAD

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by $$RICH$$, May 7, 2011.

  1. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    Da hour rang in
    check-out almost was before
    midnight still alive
     
  2. TotalView

    TotalView Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    oh, you're good. i've come up with at least three different ways this can mean.
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    express da three i love to see what u came up wit....
     
  4. TotalView

    TotalView Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Geez, I knew you were going to ask this. Ok, here goes...

    "Da hour rang in
    check-out almost was before
    midnight still alive"

    © $$RICH$$

    1. The first read - I keyed in on the words "rang" (as in rang out as in shots), "check-out almost..." (barely escaped) and "still alive" (survived). Literal near death experience.
    2. The second read - A metaphorical death. The subject needing to cleanse or purge his/herself of things that are blocking them from feeling whole. The specific time of "midnight" being used. Midnight the start of a new day and possibly a fresh start in life.
    3. The third read - sexual in nature. "Da hour rang..." Rang/vibrated/pulsated "check-out"(release) "almost was before midnight" but alas he's "still alive"

    Huh, all this for a seventeen syllabled poem. Gotta love poetry and poets

    Totalview
     
  5. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    love how u read into a poem , yes the love of poetry and poets is a great height
    and your second view was key to what i was expressing......Thankz a million TotalView
     
  6. TotalView

    TotalView Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You're most welcome, $$Rich$$
     
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