Black Relationships : Funerals & Loved Ones

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by CarrieMonet, Aug 10, 2004.

  1. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I think I went to my first funeral at age 9 and the black folks' behavior mortified me. People screaming, grabbing bodies out of the coffin, or trying to jump in the coffin, or all out hollering...just put me in shock. I remember my cousin tried to jump into the ground on top of the casket as it was put down...and my uncle told them to go on and bury her *** in there if she did. EEEK!

    So now I have a fear of funerals. I hate remembering people in coffins. I hate it that SOME idiots take pictures of people in coffins and then place them inside what looks like a normal photo album...seeing those photos always startle me.

    My grammy has talked to me until she is blue in the face about what her arrangements are for her funeral. She paid it up front through Purple Cross. I hope I'm able to attend...but it might be hard. I dread the day I go check on my grammy and she is no longer here.

    What are your thoughts or feelings regarding funerals?
     
  2. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I don't do the funeral thing either, however, If it's left up to you to handle all the details of it, then you can do it before anyone arrive.
     
  3. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    ...."go on and bury her *** in there if she did!" That had me laughing because I have been to funerals where people cut up just like that! (somebody putting a 5th of liquor in the casket....so Aunt MayJean can have a drank of liquor in heaven too!) Then you always have the cousin or somebody in the orange jumpsuit and handcuffs trying to be hard! Seriously though, I don't do funerals anymore either. I was made to go as a child. As an adult, should I die? there will not be one for me and I don't even want anyone coming to view my body. Half of my family members ain't trying to see a sista while she living. They sho' don't need to be standing next to my casket trying to cry! I'll jump up out of there and scare the h*** out they a***! My family members all of them have been Disfunctional from the get-go. Disfunctional people waiting til somebody's funeral to be FUNCTIONAL. None of them have ever got along! Most of them have moved cities away to get away from each other and have "fallen out" over the years. But they come to these funerals and Straight cut Da Fool like they loved somebody. Let me stop before I croak right here trying to log off of Destee.com. But that's how I feel. I don't go to funerals. and I won't be having one.
     
  4. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I feel you....seriously I do.
     
  5. MississippiRed

    MississippiRed Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I don't go to funerals anymore unless I just have to..I've lost too many folk and just can't do it anymore.... To Those I've loved and Lost

    Rodney Lyons, Joseph Terrel, JoJo, Disco Kid (Bryan Foster), James Perry, Vette Henderson, Barbara Session, Ethel Martin, Gaynel Boone, Robert Boone, Henry and Sally Freeman, Robert L. Williams(my Daddy see you in my dreams bruh. ) Walter and Iretha Prather, Old Dude, Otis Smith, Nanny Goat, John West, T.R. , Big Dave , Pat Garner, Theresa Ramirez, Baby Martin, Johnny Martin....... Death is the easy part living is hard... Mississippi Red :crying:
     
  6. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Nice Tribute!

    and a tribute from me to all my fam who's funerals I "sort of" missed...but I miss them in my life even more.

    Rest in peace...
    Kevin Loren Curry -passed at age 15
    Ostenia Marie Curry "grammo"
    Clarence A. Curry jr. "uncle Man"
    Dorothy A. Curry "Tea"
    George Wilburn
    Thomasine Davis
    Princess Davis
    Clarence A. Curry Sr. "pa pa"
    Uncle JW
    Uncle Ray
    Carrie Akridge
    James Akridge
    Belle Akridge
    Roy Akridge

    and to my friend Linda Lopez, one of the closest friends I had...died 6 years ago from cancer, I called her momma since she was 22 years older than me.
     
  7. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Whoa, that was ......DEEP in a BEAUTIFUL way, CarrieMonet and MississippiRed.
     
  8. toylin

    toylin Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I can't even list all my relatives/friends who have passed on..

    I go to funerals.. it's the cemetary thing I don't do unless I have to. When I die, don't give me a funeral.. have a gathering, play some reggae, light some incense and think good thoughts. Cremate me and take my ashes to africa or Jamaica or something.... Or spread them around one of my favorite oplaces, or something.. someone can be hired to do that.
     
  9. toylin

    toylin Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Additionally, my ex's mother said once about being buried... "Don't you want your kids to have somewhere to visit and talk to you?" What do you all think of that?
     
  10. sweetbrownsugar

    sweetbrownsugar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    (On Kids having somewhere to visit and being able to talk to me) -I don't want their last time seeing me? to be me in a casket. I want them to remember me being full of zest and life! I haven't thought of the perfect thing yet, but I would probably create something for them......something that will make them laugh or bring a smile to their face.
     
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