Black Relationships : Friends

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by philomath, Oct 20, 2006.

  1. philomath

    philomath Banned MEMBER

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    Hi, I am new and would like to ask a question I have been pondering for a while.

    Is it possible for black women to have real deep friendships without being accused of being lesbians or being anti black man?

    Can females gather without the supervision of males or a male appointed female overseer? Must every black female gathering center around black men to pass muster? Why are black people particularly men suspicioius of black women who have close friendships?

    I just ask because much is made of the alleged intense animosity between black females. However, when black females maintain friendships, black men are often threatened and accuse them of all sorts of stuff.

    Has anyone else noticed this?
     
  2. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Philomath ... Hello and Welcome ... :wave:

    This is an interesting thread and questions.

    I've never been accused of being a lesbian ... well, one time i was accused ... but it had nothing to do with my close friendships with Sisters. Nor have i ever been accused of being anti Black man, well, i've been accused of that once too (maybe twice), but again, not because of friendships with Sisters.

    I have very close friendships with Sisters, and never has "lesbian" or "anti Black man" ever come into my thoughts ... let alone it actually be suggested by someone.

    No ... i've not noticed any of this, but there may be other Sisters that have, and will respond.

    In the meantime ... just make yourself right at home, because you are.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  3. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

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    Hello Philomath!:wave:

    Welcome to Destee's!

    Yes, its possible for Black Women to gather and have great friendships with other women. I won't say a real deep relationship because I'm not quite sure what qualifies as real deep relationship with a women. There used to be functions and gathering for women. I think it was called a knitting party or something of that nature. There are also women clubs that are exclusively for women.

    As for men being suspicious of two female best friends, many men don't think that way. I guess it depends on the mentaliy of the man. I've heard men trash talk their womans friends, when they felt like the friend was sexually promiscuous and their woman spent more time with the friend. I've also heard men, jokingly accuse two friends of being lesbians. But I think its mainly the mentality of the individual and not exclusively a man issue.

    Again Welcome to Destee's! I hope to be reading more from you!
     
  4. sweettee29

    sweettee29 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    SUP PHILOMATH :grouphug:

    This is truly an interesting thread, because I have been shall we say accused of being a lesbian and a man hater because I have a really close friendship with a woman. She and I have been close for years now and we will continue to be close. They can say what they want only we know what we do and don't do. I must say I have never laid down with a woman nor will I ever, I love men but what I HATE IS A MAN THAT IS SO INSECURE THAT HE IS JEALOUS OF A WOMAN and that sisters is what it all boils down too. HIS OWN INSECURITIES

    Sweettee, love
    BTW Welcome to Destee I think you have come home glad to have you
     
  5. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    not with people who i know. welcome to the site. enjoy.
     
  6. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    welcome to destee.com
    I know lots of women who are close like sistas and never heard this come up
    no more then men who are close as buddy's like brothers
    again welcome within the family.
     
  7. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    My gut tells me you are not black/african.
    This is the second insulting question you have presented here.
    Enjoy your research.
     
  8. philomath

    philomath Banned MEMBER

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    your ample gut would be quite wrong

    thanks everyone for your welcomes and answers

    i was not implying all black men, but i have noticed it enough. maybe the men i know are weird

    but they seem to be intensely suspicious of any activity not centered around a male or devoted to males
     
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