Black Poetry : Free/A Spider's Lair

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Lynne', Jan 30, 2005.

  1. Lynne'

    Lynne' Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I haven't quite decided on a title yet-I was thinking either something along the lines of "Free" or "A Spider's Lair"...What yall think? Well anyway, this poem is kind of similar to butterfly in some ways. Butterfly was more about me opening up to someone new in my life, and this is about me shutting doors to some ppl from my past (ie.-an ex). Even though we weren't together, we still went out and stuff, but now...it's a looong story...but here is the poem:

    ?? Free/ A Spider's Lair ??

    I’m like a tiny insect and I’m caught in your web
    I tried so hard to break free
    But instead you captured me
    Then devoured me, then you let me free
    And I was determined not to let you see
    What you had done to me, you had tainted me
    But undeniably I kept on coming back
    To settle in your trap
    Don’t know what’s up with that
    Though part of me somehow wants to stay
    I know the safest thing for me would be to walk away
    I’m just a pawn, but I surrender, I choose not to play
    I guess what it is that I am trying to say is
    When you seen me walking out the door
    It was for the last time
    Cause I ain’t coming back no more
    I’m cutting the line
    I must destroy your web, a spider’s treacherous lair
    Cause no longer can I find any comfort there
    Cause once you’ve got me there-it doesn’t matter how much I resist
    Because I always give in once confronted by your kiss
    It’s kinda sweet, but it was sweetened artificially
    And that’s not the kinda loving that is good for me
    I need sugar, not sweet n low
    I need to tie a knot, not tie a bow
    I need to be fed- mind, body, and soul
    I need to regain some kinda control
    I’m cutting all ties with any loose ends
    I’m in search of a love that only transcends
    No longer enamored by what we once shared
    It was holding me back, but now I’m prepared
    To break free and move on
    I can’t keep singing the same ol’ song
    You were once my predator, but I’m no longer your prey
    You’ll have to go find a new buffet
    I am like a tiny insect that was once caught in your web
    At first you captured me
    But now I’m setting myself free


    Hope yall like...
     
  2. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hi Lynne,
    Have you checked out our new "critique workshop" poetry forum? this would have been the perfect place to put this piece.
    I think it's a awesome work of art, wonderfully put. I enjoyed reading this poet ...I've been there before.
     
  3. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This was a wonderfully crafted piece, and the images of the spider and the web were on the money. No picnic being caught in a web of love. But you ended this on a positive note I see. Flow on.
     
  4. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    tyte flow love the motion of ya pen
     
  5. PlayWitItPimp05

    PlayWitItPimp05 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    nice scribe lynne

    i actually prefer the title a spider's lair for this piece
    it was nicely written and very sentimental

    thank you for sharing

    :heart: :heart: PLAY :heart: :heart:
     
  6. gempis

    gempis Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I can relate, and the flow is extremely tight.
     
  7. Khasm13

    Khasm13 STAFF STAFF

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    interesting prose...the name fits this piece nicely...

    one love
    khasm
     
  8. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    tru dat !!!!
    wonder where Lynne is now !
     
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