Black Relationships : For Males Only

[legit-writer]

And another thing, I been stopped calling him. And I have moved on. Thanks everyone for their responses.


And the moment he notices, he'll start calling you again. THEY ALL COME BACK! Just thought i'd get that last one in. LOL!

Who all comes back?

 

[fenixrisin]

"Who all comes back?"

Just my generalization and experience with men. May be considered an unfair generalization, especially in this forum, but the moment you dont call or pay attention to them, the majority of the time, they will call back at least once to find out what happened to their suitor. Seen it happen too many times.

 

[Monetary]

First of all, your assumed reasons are not why he broke up with me. Second of all. I did not cause him to end a relationship. Third of all, why are you so focused on blame for? That's not making anything better. Blame is not going to solve anything. That's for 4 and 5 year old kids. When I am in any situation, I don't focus on blame. I focus on how to make things right. Fourth of all, I am not a crazy deranged woman. Fifth of all, the kind of messages I leave are nice songs to him, which are from the heart, and explaining to him that I totally understand that he is in stressful situation as to why he is not ready for a relationship. Sixth of all, I am doing my best to learn all over again to trust, but there is nothing wrong with interacting with people as part of learning to do such. If I don't learn to interact with others, how else am I going to learn to talk to people? I don't need people like you to look at me as an unstable person just because I am trying to learn. Seventh of all, I have not had a long distance relationship in a long time, and all I was doing was try to adjust to this kind of thing again. Eigth of all, no he didn't cheat on me. Ninth of all, who are you to judge whether or not I am stressing him. And tenth of all, since you don't know me very well, instead of thinking that you are so sure as to why he doesn't want to talk to me anymore, you should lable them as probable or maybes because you don't know for sure, and I don't either. Tenth of all, I call a couple of times a day. Eleventh of all, he already knows that I was hurt in the past and that he said that he was going to help me worth through them. Twelfth of all, I did not behave a "certain" way for him to leave me. Thirteenth of all, before we cut of communication, he told me that he has strong feelings for me, but he is not ready for a relationship right now, and that he has to study for exams and things like that, since he is going to school to be a doctor. And fourteenth of all, if you know what's good for you, don't call me out of what I am. I am not crazy. I am just a 21 year old, normal, but sensitive person who went through a lot of **** in her past, and is woman enough to find ways to cope with them. So if you know what is good for you, don't call me crazy again. Thank you! Now if you would excuse me, I have other things to do than to be on this net all day, arguing about who I am and who I am not!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I said I would tell it how it is. If I had known how old you are, I probably would have sugarcoated it just a little. I don't believe what I said was mean at all. It's all in how you take things. And, from what I've seen so far, you take everything to heart...which you shouldn't. At least you admitted to being sensitive...because that you are.

Anyhow...let me say a few things here.

1. You still have feelings for this guy if you're still wondering about him after all this time...however long that is.

2. Destee tried her best to help you think through this situation and you rejected her help. You didn't even consider it. You ask for everyone's opionion...but you only want to hear from those people who will validate your view on this...and that ain't gonna happen. You will get varying opinions on the situation you've presented to us...because we, as a people, are different, with different experiences.

3. I placed myself in his shoes. Given the little information you provided, I filled in some parts in order to reach some conclusion as to why he would keep your messages on his answering machine or voicemail. That was the whole point of saying what I said at the beginning...so that you would have something to base my final statement on.

4. Now, from what you've stated above, he cannot focus on his studies and help you deal with the issues from your past at the same time. So, he decided to focus on his studies. I don't think he would cut off ALL communication with you just because he had to study. YOU AND YOUR ISSUES DROVE THE MAN AWAY.. Wait a minute...that's not exactly what I wanted to say. Please, let me rephrase that. Given his limited time (24 hours in a day) which is dedicated to various things in his life (which includes helping you with your issues), he cannot study for his Med exams AND help you with your issues at the same time. So, I suggest that you give him some time to study for his Med exams, call him with a nice message saying that you miss your FRIEND and your conversations. Of course, this should be said in a very nice sincere tone of voice. Then, see if he returns your call. Most likely he won't...but that's ok.

4. I respect and acknowledge the pain and hurt from your past experiences. I do. However, I truly feel that there are some issues remaining that you need to address. To fly off the handle because you don't agree with our opinions--which you take out of context--is not good. You need help. I advise that you get some.

Nothing but concern for your well-being.

 

[legit-writer]

"Who all comes back?"

Just my generalization and experience with men. May be considered an unfair generalization, especially in this forum, but the moment you dont call or pay attention to them, the majority of the time, they will call back at least once to find out what happened to their suitor. Seen it happen too many times.

Oh okay. Gotcha

 

[Destee]

And the moment he notices, he'll start calling you again. THEY ALL COME BACK! Just thought i'd get that last one in. LOL!

Sister Fenixrisin ... you say this like it is some sort of prize ... just recompense ... or something??!!

So what if a man ... who has broken your heart ... told you that he doesn't want to speak to you ... is not interested in you ... so what if he comes back and says "Hey, Wassup?!!"

This is very little to glean joy from.

In fact, it's almost like being happy that you could get a drop of blood from a turnip.

* sigh *



Destee