Black Men : Fathers lead by example

Discussion in 'Black Men - Fathers - Brothers - Sons' started by MsVeraisblessed, Mar 15, 2012.

  1. MsVeraisblessed

    MsVeraisblessed Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    [​IMG]

    You know we see this everyday, right?
     
  2. Keita Kenyatta

    Keita Kenyatta going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Yeah, we see it everyday without realizing that it began to be promoted among our people beginning in 1972. However, without having to go into any explanation at all, your picture says more than a mountain of words ever can. Asante Sana (thank you very much !)
     
  3. houserunner

    houserunner Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It's sad that not only the know suppressors in our life that want you to fail, yet you also have those of our own that perpetuate the negative stigma and frown upon doing what is productive. I'm not the best father in the world but I'd like to think I am equipping my children with pertinent information and love so they can independently excel in life and look back and say that I had a positive effect on their lives.
     
  4. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    It's become a nightmare in nearly every community, we see the upside but on a now rare view
    while we see the downside like every day the second we part our home doors we see bad example
    displayed, but i see it from both ends of parenthood and so many fatherless or have no role modle
    but the streets as there father and king.

    The way i see it is we as fathers/men are losing the battle as well our many youth to the might
    streets, now i wonder how many youth really make it out the maze of self destruction your image
    above say much it need to be posted cross everywhere on billboards ,thankz for the alert to black
    men/fathers....................let us now lead to our fullest and see if we can't change the view.
     
  5. MsVeraisblessed

    MsVeraisblessed Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm pretty much sure that not all fatheres lead bad examples. Fathers have to learn to be the best like we mothers have to be.
     
  6. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    It's very difficult for one to teach what they do not know their own selves.

    It can be done ... but it's not easy ... and that's what we're up against in many cases.

    Both men and women ... mothers and fathers ... we've got to teach stuff (in many cases) that we're just learning our own selves.

    It's only natural that the babies exhibit the things that they do.

    Love You and Thanks.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  7. MimiBelle

    MimiBelle Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    No, I don't see this everyday...but there's probably no point in discussing it.

    I see good and poor examples of fathers...and I see good and poor examples of mothers. If you go to certain areas, you'll see more of one type versus the other.

    Personally, I don't know of anyone over 25 who 'sags' their pants....*shrug*
     
  8. Shikamaru

    Shikamaru Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I sag in my house, but not out in public :).
     
  9. skuderjaymes

    skuderjaymes Contextualizer Synthesizer MEMBER

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    If I could use just one sentence to answer this post, I would say, "I'm not sure if Oscar Grant was sagging or not when he was handcuffed and killed by that racist cop.. but it doesn't matter now.. does it?."

    but I wrote all this other stuff before that line came out.. so, here it is:


    The critique of the sagging thing within the black community usually falls into one of two categories: Class warfare.. or Age warfare. but context is everything.. and what happens to the folks on either side of this picture is outside the hands of the black community. And and so the kid on the right is no better than the kid on the left. and neither are the fathers. And that cop car should be on both sides of the picture because the cops will put a bullet in either one. ​

    What we need is the ability to love them all.. to respect them all. To empathize with them all.. and to not trivialize what our men are up against. Yeah.. the cops wouldn't bother black men if they would just pull their pants up.. right.. and by "bother" I mean kill, imprison, target, brutalize, etc. Sagging is the same as Zoot suiting.. is the same as Afros.. is the same as slightly sagging 501s with sewed-in creases and Starter jackets were in the 80's.. It's the hallmark of a group of folks that have rejected the boxes prebuilt to hold contain them. It's a passive middle-finger to a society that does not value us and that has labeled us "Public Enemy No. 1". ​

    The thinking goes something like this: "You hate me.. you kill me.. you lock me away.. you impoverish my family.. you flood my neighborhood with dope.. you flood my neighborhood with guns.. you pull our families apart with social services.. you use every tool in yoru arsenal against my existence and then expect me to live by the rules of society? Im supposed to talk quietly.. to care about what you think of me?... to wait for the light to turn green?... to dress and act like everything is ok? Yeah right."

    So, among other things, it's also a subtle form of protest.. and then it became fashion.. and even folks that identify with what it represents adopt it is their look. So, in a way, it becomes folded-in to the status quo.. and when it does, the real rebels sag even harder. Truth is, everything black men do is demonized and pointed to as some kind of decadence.. and also "The reason". But, listen.. it's really really easy to confuse what he looks like with what happens to him. Especially when you are afraid to look white society in the eye. It's easier to say, "if he didn't look like that, that wouldn't happen to him".. "so all I gotta do is not look like him and I'll be safe" but is that really true?​

    It's worth a shot, but it certainly is not any guarantee of safety.. because although sagging marks you as someone willing to go against the grain.. your blackness does that anyway. And in the absence of any sagging dudes, you and whatever your look is will fill thethreatening black male void just fine. I've been to many countries. They sag in Japan.. they sag all over the world.. but the difference is, those boys/men aren't persecuted in Japan.. so no one associates sagging with being arrested.. or with hustling.. or with anything negative.. it's just looked at as a style. I'm not sure if Oscar Grant was sagging or not when he was handcuffed and killed by that racist cop.. but does it really matter?​

    We've been shot down and locked-away and used and abused in every single generation of our existence in america.. regardless of what we were wearing. I think its time to recognize that and stand up and out of these comfortable and tidy rationalizations of our condition here in America. There was a time in our history when it was generally accepted that if we could just be better.. be cleaner.. be neater.. look more like them.. talk more like them.. walk more like them.. think more like them.. that everything would be better for us.. that they would leave us be.. that the doors of opportunity would open for us all. And we responded by with various forms of self-mutilation just trying to fit in.. burning our hair straight with heat and dangerous chemicals.. bleaching our skin.. denouncing our own image.. our own bodies.. our homeland.. etc.. but they still shot us down.. and we learned through much blood and tears that it has very little to do with what we do.. or how we look.. but everything to do with white societies disdain for African humanity.​

    .. And this is just one of the angles I see in response to that picture.. ​
     
  10. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Great Great Points! :toast:

    You expand my thinking ... almost always now ... wassup with that!?! ... :love:

    Thanks for Sharing ... Love You!

    :heart:

    Destee
     
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