Black Relationships : Father

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Jul 11, 2016
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no, you would not....
What is your opinion how our lives should proceed now we have a mother and daughter without a husband/biological father ? Please, no what should have been or what should have been done, just what should be done from here on.
 

Bootzey

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That child is very young and completely impressionable. I don't think you should be a presence in her life until you are CERTAIN that you and her mother are committed to a longterm relationship like... marriage
 

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Jul 11, 2016
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That child is very young and completely impressionable. I don't think you should be a presence in her life until you are CERTAIN that you and her mother are committed to a longterm relationship like... marriage
Yes, that is why I am in deep thought before even beginning those sorts of discussions with the mother and thought to hear some of your thoughts too.
 

jamesfrmphilly

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That child is very young and completely impressionable. I don't think you should be a presence in her life until you are CERTAIN that you and her mother are committed to a longterm relationship like... marriage
nah, i been wit plenty of single moms. ain't no ting.
if the woman is a mother she will see to it that the child is cool.
 

skuderjaymes

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I was going to post this in the men's forum but thought, I am tired of all efforts to divide black men and black women, so I'm putting it in the relationship forum where black people can give their opinion.

It's simple. I am single; no children. I met a single women who is amazing and who has a daughter. Should I pursue a relationship with her ? Doing so would mean I would essentially become the father of her daughter.

What are your thoughts ?

To my way of thinking, unless the father of her daughter is dead.. she's not single. And she belongs with the dude that she made that baby with. If you steer clear of her, you'll be leaving room for them to workout their situation. Why chance becoming baby-daddy number two?

Find yourself a truly single, unscorned partner to build with.


..context is everything.
 

Bootzey

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nah, i been wit plenty of single moms. ain't no ting.
if the woman is a mother she will see to it that the child is cool.
That's what I'm talking about... so you've been in and out of many children's lives, letting them get attached to you and then you bounce leaving the mother to deal with the fallout. My mother was a quasi single mother. She and my father had their paramours. I really wish I hadn't been a pawn in their relationships. No one seems to be thinking about the children...

When I was single, I had 2 main rules with the men I dated. (1) they had to have been raised in a 2 parent home and (2) no kids
 

jamesfrmphilly

going above and beyond
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That's what I'm talking about... so you've been in and out of many children's lives, letting them get attached to you and then you bounce leaving the mother to deal with the fallout. My mother was a quasi single mother. She and my father had their paramours. I really wish I hadn't been a pawn in their relationships. No one seems to be thinking about the children...

When I was single, I had 2 main rules with the men I dated. (1) they had to have been raised in a 2 parent home and (2) no kids
i am sorry that you had negative experiences in life. i refuse to allow you to put that negativity on me.
i never would and never have put any stress on any child.
 

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