Black Relationships : falling out of love

i keep hearing that if a person 'falls out of love' that they were never in love with them to begin with. for those who agree with this theory, why?for those who do not agree...why not?

Love means you give a person a part of yourself. You let them in. And you in them. It is sometimes mistaken. But if it is true on both parties, it doesnt go away. In a sense, it is an addiction. You go thru widthdrawal. Now you may never want to do the drug again. But you are addicted forever



..
 
I have an issue with the terminology..."FALLING in love". What exactly does that mean? For me, to fall anywhere sends a message there's going to be some pain involved. I don't like thinking that way about someone that I have deep feelings for. Fall out denotes residue from something like a volcanic eruption or a meltdown of some sort at a nuclear plant. Again, not situations I'd like to be in. Where did these strange terms come from, to depict feelings?
 
I have an issue with the terminology..."FALLING in love". What exactly does that mean? For me, to fall anywhere sends a message there's going to be some pain involved. I don't like thinking that way about someone that I have deep feelings for. Fall out denotes residue from something like a volcanic eruption or a meltdown of some sort at a nuclear plant. Again, not situations I'd like to be in. Where did these strange terms come from, to depict feelings?



Or it could just mean, to let go of your resitance






..
 
I thought that NNQueen was going to run with this based upon her opening...but I never liked the term "falling in love" either. Falling states that one is moving from a HIGHER STATE OR CONDITION INTO A LOWER STATE OR CONDITION. Therefore we should GROW in love as it is something that will happen in stages. Stage one may be the physical attraction. Stage two may be the mental or intellectual bonding. Stage three may be the cultural bonding or sameness in terms of what the two of you like and dislike. Stage three may be the spiritual connections that you two share. Stage four may be the sexual union that you two share. etc. etc.

But the point is that it occurs in stages...growing stages, not falling stages. I meri you is what our ancestors in Kemet would have said. Love as we know it to be is a warped concept that came from the Christian era of time and is not a universal concept or word. Because people are ALWAYS GROWING AND CHANGING, ( which we all should be doing) it is possible for a person to grow out of love with someone else. In other words, if the two of you are not growing together in the same direction, then yes, you can grow out of love with someone. It doesn't mean that you never loved him or her, it just means that the two of you have grown in two separate directions that no longer serve as the glue or cement that first held the two of you together.

Me and my second wife were like twins. We could be talking or doing something and we would find ourselves completing each others sentences or doing what we some how knew that the other would do. It was uncanny. We could in the midst of silence suddenly start talking and saying the same thing at the same time...but I digress here.
 
Love is the greatest form of understanding. You neither fall in or out of it. When you know as much as you can about an individual, and choose to add on with them anyway. That's love. To choose to no longer add on with an individual means either you understand self's needs to no longer be met or you found out some new additional information that makes that relationship no longer feasible.

It's all Mathematical.....
 

Donate

Support destee.com, the oldest, most respectful, online black community in the world - PayPal or CashApp

Latest profile posts

HODEE wrote on Etophil's profile.
Welcome to Destee
@Etophil
Destee wrote on SleezyBigSlim's profile.
Hi @SleezyBigSlim ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ... :flowers: ... please make yourself at home ... :swings:
Back
Top