Black Poetry : Empire's Falling

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by nabraska, Aug 15, 2004.

  1. nabraska

    nabraska Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This is a piece that I have posted on my site, but I wanted some feedback on it so I hope you don't mind if I've posted it her as well. Thankyou.

    none of us are without fault
    striving to perfection, upon pillows of plummet and plunder.....
    the tale tail tape of triumph
    is measured in black soot ashes of
    always and never.......
    cleverly sun rises as bodies turn to riders
    wandering the waves of reality and
    experience,
    but wanting the end
    by the fall of sun.
    new days are marked by
    birth certificates, burned buildings and eternal sleep of endured generations.
    Night falls to unknown endings
    as cowardice acts allow the action to unfold......
    no more stories told of shadows so cold
    that lazy-boy chairs could not comfort,
    but the shirt is ripped and the flesh has been fired
    upon
    dawn.....is at the break
    what shall be done about cakes, and capes,
    that are red, white, and blue, no more profiling over those untrue
    to the unnatural cause of
    empires falling.......

    empires falling, empires falling
    there is no calling by cattle herded in the mist...
    there is a miss of freedom as
    locks come crashing down destiny's
    pipe.
    Now behind closed doors
    w/no key
    attempting to define the true meaning
    of being free...
    but this can't be me; I be singing
    my country tis of thee
    placing my hand over my heart;
    isn't this how it starts:
    Pledging allegiance
    to a flag
    for a united place....
    a united place!......
    Must not of been my face in '63 when we was facin' old oak trees marchin'' in the streets tryin' to find some peace from all that brutality;
    "My country tis of thee sweet land of bi-go-tree of thee I see..........."
    Your empire's falling

    Formulas failed by flying colors
    so corporations created dollars for forgotten nations.
    but my people still hungry
    As fat cats stroke power ties....
    now their heads hung low
    behind all that died
    Symbols slide to concrete endings...
    Ain't no beginning to your elitist mindset,
    ...long as you get that jet
    back in the air....
    yet you don't care 'bout the people
    All you see is dem dalla signs
    on the backs of blacks, hispanics, and blind,
    your crime should equal the end of your rule
    never to be written in books
    or read in schools
    My desire to end your empire should rise by the dawn of sun...
    All your silly symbols will be shunned by sinking sands instead of guns
    Now I'm the plan man w/earth in hand controlling her rotation-spreading my fingers, releasing my thumb to build a brand new nation because your empire's falling....

    The date of destruction has completed construction as deduction of subjunctives take forth in spite of ties that lie in court......
    Judged on manhood/judged on pride judged on patriotism which is lost inside
    Judged in the past and sentenced in the present
    Now the damage is done and you just can't stand it
    Danger has been my life as homicidal thoughts
    run the nite when eyes shut tight...
    (my **** dreams ain't right)
    As they reason to become mares....
    stares are seeping to the unsanctioned section of my soul
    secretion so bold that I wake in a cold sweat
    Ready-watching that jet crash the tower
    the hour- so significant to the date,
    9/11 straight hate
    and now you see how I feel

    cuzz your empire's falling......



    I thank you for reading the entire piece, but please leave me some feed back, if you mad, let me know, if u not feelin' it, let me know; this is the only way I can grow, and we can grow....thankyou
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    respectfully i like da creation of this flow
    how u pose the lyrical flip of it and da message
    tyte drop i like ...............keep flowing Nabraska
     
  3. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    well, i enjoyed this posed well
    a flow a speech it was tight
    thank you for sharing it....
    Angel
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Well, first of all, this flowed very easily, so it was not difficult to read even though it was a bit long. I'm not mad, I don't think you're making light of 9/11 and the lives lost. I think you are pointing out, as others have, that this was a wakeup call. That this country is not invincible, and that loss can affect any one no matter what their status. Thought provoking scribe, and I can always appreciate that.
     
  5. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    :wave: Hello and Welcome Nabraska :wave:

    this is very nice poetry, i too was able to follow easily along ...

    very though provoking peace ... please keep sharing

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  6. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Thought provoking peace...
    with many social elements
    If a poet continuously writes
    A poet continuously grows...

    Your work is beautiful thus far...
    Enjoyed the read...
    Continue to share with us... :wave:
     
  7. nabraska

    nabraska Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I had to say thankyou for all who are reading this piece (cuzz hey I know it's long) but thank you for not only reading it but also leaving a message. I think that it is important that we not only think but question. Thank you again, peace and blessings.....scribe nabraska
     
  8. Prizefighter16

    Prizefighter16 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Very very insightful poem
    a lot of symbolism is used
    with a comfortable flow
    i love it
    and im glad you addressed 9/11
    no, you did more than address
    you acknowledged it
    i would love to read more of your words, poet
    keep the flow going
     
  9. nabraska

    nabraska Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Since it is September 11, I wanted to bring this topic/post/ piece back to the forefront so that we could remeber the lives lost and the cost of the imperialism that america/bush is taking us to. Remember the cost, the lost, and the future, let's get involved in world affairs; we may be the strongest country, but we are also the most remote in terms of thinking and caring about other countries. One love to the Diaspora, one love goes out to Jamaica who is in need right now because of dangerous hurricancanes.

    I also wanted to provide a link to this article I ran across last week that deals with america and her imperialistic ways.

    article

    I hope I haven't broken too many rules with this Destee, I just wanted to inform the family
     
  10. toylin

    toylin Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    All earthly things must come to an end. Beautifully written, very emotive. Amerika, how could you leave me so black and blue..... Uh oh..Inspiration! Thanks Nabraska! :)
     
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