Black People : Emotional Manipulation and Abuse Along with Selective Memory and Reasoning

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by Hetheru Oshun, Jul 31, 2014.

  1. Hetheru Oshun

    Hetheru Oshun Banned MEMBER

    Jul 29, 2014
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    Emotional blackmail: Using another's feelings for you or something else they like, love or care for against them. Usually the offender will do something wrong and then to release themselves from blame or responsibility of their wrongful actions or behaviors, they'll flip the script and make the victim feel guilty, as though they were the original perpertrator of the wrongdoings.

    The true offender may feign hurt feelings and come up with faulty or false accusations as part of the manipulative/abusive behavior (emotional blackmail/abuse). The blackmailer may also do this to accomplish a desired result that will self servingly work out on their behalf or to attain/receive something (physical or otherwise) that they desire. Also, this may be done in order for someone to get their way and/or to fulfill a motive or agenda which are usually based on the behaviors spoken of below (Note: The following also shortly explains selective memory and reasoning):

    Seeing things within a biased/prejudiced scope. Conveniently, the offender/perpertrator only remembering when someone has wronged or upset them (usually imaginary or created sleights) or only remembering someone else's sleight infractions but the true offender always conveniently forgetting their own shortcomings or infractions against others.

    If they do happen to admit to wrongdoings, they usually make excuses for them or tell the victims it was their fault or something they supposedly did or said that set off the offender's outburst or attacks. They usually don't take responsibility for their own actions/reactions. These people reason out bad behaviors or habits to suit their vices, selfishness, self serving agendas, lusts, desires,etc. These types are irresponsible, immature, untrustworthy and usually have a history of shaky relationships, friendships, and possible broken family ties. At their very worst, they may be unpredictable and violent.

    If you notice these patterns in someone you are personally dealing with (relationship or otherwise) you may want to rethink your associations with such ones, especially if you have made them aware of their behavior and yet, they refuse to change. You might want to consider moving on. At the least, relations with one such offender may result in effects that may take years to reverse or heal from. At the most serious, lifelong irreversible damage.

    Wisdom: Never love another more than you love yourself, for loving self IS the love of others.