Black Relationships : Do You IM?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by CarrieMonet, Aug 11, 2004.

  1. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm just wondering if many of you out there talk/communicate with family and friends via IM. I don't mind talking to family and long time friends. But sometimes there seems to be issues adding new people to my list of IM friends.

    Sometimes IM'ing with someone new can be quite annoying. I was sitting here thinking...about IM ettiquette...thought we could all start a list. Here are a few of my suggestions.


    IM Don'ts:

    1. Don't send a message to someone as soon as you see them log on, it only seems courteous to allow about 10 minutes to go by, 9 times of out 10 they would like to check e-mail and their favorite sites before chatting. Sometimes they will start the conversation with you if you allow them time to get adjusted.

    2. Don't interview people like you are doing a story for the National Inquirer. Regular conversation usually reveals more than it would if you fire questions at someone. (i.e., Do you like Seattle?, Did you have a nice day?, Have you ever lived in another city?, Are you married? Are you single?,What are you looking for in a man?, Tell me about yourself? What is your age, sex and location? ) JUST CONVERSATE...it will all come out in the wash.

    3. Take a HINT. If someone is slow to respond, they may be busy doing something else. Just let them contact you when they have more time.

    4. Send an e-mail asking to be added to an IM. You set yourself up for denial by sending the invite straight through.

    5. Don't assume chatting on an IM is a relationship. I know that sounds like crazy advice, but some people really do get this one confused.
     
  2. MrBlak

    MrBlak Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I speak to my brother and sister mostly on MSN messenger. I have a few people that I met on message boards that I speak to on it too. I consider it a type of friendship....I mean it may not translate to the real world, but for some of us, it is a big portion of the social interaction we get. You are right though to put that last rule because some people get the wrong idea about communicating on the net....it is no substitute for the real world and you really dont know someone till you know them in the real world.

    I like to keep a small list of contacts and mostly use it when I could never meet the person face to face (distance) or to suppliment an existing relationship in the real world.
     
  3. toylin

    toylin Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Oh, I IM ALL the time! That and email are about the only way i keep in touch with a large group of people.. namely, people in other states and countries, without running up my phone bill. You got the etiquette thing right, though. I HATE when people see me log on and IM me, and get salty when I don't respond right away. I usually log on and walk away from the comp.....
     
  4. MANASIAC

    MANASIAC Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    IMing is cool. I do it daily at least.
     
  5. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    That is exactly what I'm talking about. That is so annoying.
     
  6. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    IM, is that a new social disease?
     
  7. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    i wouldn't call it a disease but a formal communication with others cross
    the goble the net give us this line to keep in contact with family and
    friends without making a long distance call i talk on IM as well but it's
    a way to build a friendship with people around the world maybe not meeting
    or really face to face but by communication , some time it can be annoying
    use own judgement when to hit somebody up or see if they not busy and
    like to chat a little that day everyday use of it can take you away from what
    you really on line doing i keep in touch with friends from high school my family
    and meet a few new one along the way just to chat but never do i seek to
    be boring or annoying to a person it's a cool tool and resource we have in today's
    world ....... those are some great facts you laid out there Carriemonet..
     
  8. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Thanks Rich!! :)