After you have already engaged a brother's attention, conversation, and even gone out with him a few times, would you ask him what kind of woman is ideal? Isn't that a recipe for hurt feelings or at least insecurity in a developing relationship? I have been seeing this sister who is very refined/reserved, a few years older, very pretty, elegant, intelligent, cultured, open-minded, not religious, amongst other things. We had just finished having a very nice evening at this jazz lounge over a drink which involved some intimate discussion. As we are leaving she asks, "So what do you like in women?...what is ideal to you?" Apprehensive about the subject, I kind of avoided the question. However, she insisted for me to tell all, so I said this... "I like women who are intelligent, vocal, cultured, mentally-strong, not supericial, not materialistic...a couple of things that may be a bit sensitive is that I like women who are fit or in shape, especially with athletic bodies, and with natural hair." Everything was good until I talked about a woman being in shape and having natural hair because she possessed neither traits. She isn't overweight, but she is on the thick side and not in very good shape. She has a weaved braided style, and I am pretty sure her hair has relaxer in it. In a way, I thought that it was understood that these were not all essential traits. She had just finished telling me about what she liked, which did not encompass me in many aspects, but I didn't get offended in any way. Anyhow, what was left of the evening walking her to her car was very uncomfortable with moments of deafening silence. I felt really bad because I am starting to really like her. I am not one who likes to sugar-coat my words...Should I have known better than to speak exactly what was on my mind, or should she not have asked such a question since it was obvious that I was already very much interested in her?