Black Relationships : Do black women and men want to unite? Or are we just tired of each other?

Why have we adapted and settled for all the negativity in regards to our relationships to one another? Then turn around and complain and generalize each other? Then run to other races as if it's that's going to make it somehow better? Since when is expecting better from our men/women become more of a burden than asset? What the hell is going on?


I suspect the issues between black men and black women for the most part reflect the "war between the sexes" that has existed for thousands of years. Women of all races will complain about men and vice versa.

Some black men and black women have "run to other races," as you mentioned. However, I suspect many--if not most--interracial relationships are the result of America being a country in which people of different colors interact on a regular basis at work, school, church, in their neighborhoods, at social gatherings (online and offline), etc.

Finally, it's not as if black men and women haven't been uniting. After all, 95% of married black women and 89% of married black men are wedded to black partners.

KM
 
Why have we adapted and settled for all the negativity in regards to our relationships to one another? Then turn around and complain and generalize each other? Then run to other races as if it's that's going to make it somehow better? Since when is expecting better from our men/women become more of a burden than asset? What the hell is going on?

Not all of us have these issues so maybe you need to get out more.

I get tired of the thought that "WE" as a collective can't get along with one another yet when I do an evaluation of my inner circle it doesn't resemble anything remotely close to what is being pushed off as us having this self hate / crabs I'm a barrel traits.

I can't say it doesn't exist but if we are to continue to have false perceptions that we can't.... then we won't recognize positives that most of us do on a regular...
 
We cannot solve this issue if we take sides. Neither party were absent from the evolution of our society. These norms we have are just as much forced upon us as upheld by us as we complain. We need to talk about defining ourselves ourselves as Black men and women. Too long has every other culture told us what we are. Our habits and ways are appropriated and then sold back to us in a bastardized form, too ugly to recognize for their original beauty.

There is nothing wrong with black men and women. There is nothing wrong with homosexuality or transexuality. These are in nature and so they are in us. Whether we want to change this about ourselves is a decision we make on an individual basis. I will have no one of any race dictating to me what to do with my body or how to feel. I will have no one tell me what comes natural to me (being black, having curly hair, being a man, being spiritual or effeminate at times) is unnatural. I do not let inferior creatures dictate anything to me. Only inferior creatures steal -- that is because they do not have what they seek.

So, think of this: why is the black man "hyper"masculine? Why is it that we are the epitome of aggression and machismo, of paternal drives (daddyhood) and show? What standard is there in the world of men and who holds the title? Yes, exactly, it is an absurd notion. No one can tell anyone how masculine to be. The same goes for our sisters who are told they are "hyper"sexual. These are concepts that we embody in a way as well as concepts that are forced upon us by eurocentric practicioners. These are aspects that have been warped and used against us. Whose fault is it that black men and women are delicious examples of physicality? No ones. It is those who cannot control themselves with the problem. See: everyone else.

Do not settle for their labels and intellectualization of our problems. Hold our black leaders responsible for spewing the same rhetoric everyone else does (eg rap is to blame for violence in black culture b.s.). Decide yourself who and what you'll be and what for. The rest will become irrelevant.
 
Why have we adapted and settled for all the negativity in regards to our relationships to one another? Then turn around and complain and generalize each other? Then run to other races as if it's that's going to make it somehow better? Since when is expecting better from our men/women become more of a burden than asset? What the hell is going on?

No, I don't believe many want to unite at all. They see greener grass on the other side, and seek reasons or excuses to leave others like them behind. Many, however, I do believe have gone through so much trouble with the opposite gender, they really do find better elsewhere.

Black Americans are a unique kind of people, with some unique troubles within the community.
 
No, I don't believe many want to unite at all. They see greener grass on the other side, and seek reasons or excuses to leave others like them behind. Many, however, I do believe have gone through so much trouble with the opposite gender, they really do find better elsewhere.

Black Americans are a unique kind of people, with some unique troubles within the community.



The grass is only greener on the other side, if you don't take care of your own lawn





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