Black Relationships : Difference in Treatment Based on Number of Partners

Who cares what another person thinks or says about your social behavior? I mean really.. at
some point, the individual has to step up and out of the cesspool of public opinion.. all the he-
saids and she-saids really dont amount to much of anything at all.. It must be a terrible fate to
have your social esteem tied to what other people may think or say about you.. I graduated
high school hella long ago.. and I havent been concerned about what others think about me
since then.. I just do my thing and let the chips fall where they may.. they can say whatever
they want.. they can talk about me.. slander my character.. I dont give a **** because it does
not matter to me.. I think the power of gossip lies in the targets desire to be liked/loved by
his/her peers..

I cut that part of me out before the age of 15.. and I have since come to understand that when
people say, "so and so said this about me and I'm mad" or "so and so is talking a behind my
back".. all they are really doing is revealing how insecure they are as people.. they're are unsure
of what they are doing and are basically checking over their backs before and after every
move.. and by wondering what people think, they are actually doubting their own selves.. they
are expressing their own personal uneasiness about what they themselves are doing.

When I make a move, I don't even wonder what other people may think.. it doesn't even cross
my mind.. and that's how I know that I don't care.. because if you are are consciously thinking
"I don' t care what they think", then you actually do care what they think.. what you dont care
about, does not even enter your consciousness.. but I'm not a woman.. and I think the social
culture of young black women is where you should look for answers to these kinds of
questions.. because all of the insecurities and rivalries and desires commingle and conspire to
create the ways that young black women relate to us and to each other.. that culture influences
how young black women see and feel and act.


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