Black Relationships : Desperately need advice

Christiana

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REGISTERED MEMBER
Aug 26, 2008
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student
Hey everyone,
my name is Christiana. I'm 21 years old and am attending college to study social work. I stay in an on campus apartment at the university. As part of my major requirements I have to do internships. At the internship I'm working at right now there are always inmates from the local jail who work there doing custodial jobs on some sort of work release is what I'm guessing. I became friends with one of the inmates there. We would talk and chat on our lunch breaks and in the mornings before we started work. He seemed like a nice guy-very well mannered and level headed. I assumed that he went to jail for something like vandalism, drugs, or something of that nature. I never would have thought that he had hurt another person directly.
We exchanged numbers and he said that he would get in touch with me after he got out and maybe we could hang out or something. He got in touch with me the day that he was released. A couple of days later we had a long conversation. I found out alot about him and i found out why he got put in jail. According to him he had sex with a girl who said she was 17. He had just turned 18. Come to find out she was actually 15 and was lieng about her age the whole time. So he was arrested and convicted of raping a 15 year old girl-it was consensual.
He seems like he's repented of his mistakes and is trying to move on and do better with his life. he wants to hang out with me on Friday. We were just planning on hanging out at my college-playing video games, playing ping pong, things like that. Part of me says that I should give him a chance-maybe he really didn't know that she was 15. But is that an excuse? He's been asking me questions about sexual things that i don't feel comfortable talking about and is flirtatioush with me. I told him to stop and he did.
If it were you would you hang out with him, get to know him more over the phone before meeting in person, or break all contact with him? By the way i"m not planning on dating him at all. But is it dangerous to be his friend? What are your opinions?
Christiana
 
Hi Christina,
My advise to you is continue to have phone conversations with him and then you would learn more about him by listening to his tone, aspirations intentions,etc. I feel it it too early for you & him to hang out with you on campus. Many times young sisters become prey to young men by just simply being nice, because they began a relationship with them before they truly know them. I just want you to be safe & stay safe. Please to not leap before looking.

Love & Blessings,
DREA
 
I would be cautious of who you are friends with. People who are child molesters, sex offenders most of the time know the people they victimize. They can be charming that is how they when your friendship and trust. It's okay to be nice but this is your internship those things can jeopardize a lot for you. And how do you know it was consensual? Because he told you?

I'm taking Human Services also and working with youth in the juvenile system. Some of them are sex offenders too...

 

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