Demons and Nightmares The deceit must stop and the truth must be made known I think I’m going to forever walk the earth alone without trust, or hope, who can be truly happy? In my eyes I’m a simple man, but no one can understand me I don’t know why I find it so hard to trust anyone but myself.... I think I’ve seen so many people, do so much wrong.. I lost my faith in humanity as a whole I hear it’s better to love and have lost than never loved at all that’s stupid, now I know just what I’m missing out on I would rather be foreign to the feelings and just go through life without the memories of things that were, and will never be again I’m part of the problem I know, too complex for my own tastes all my romance and passion, is now going to dry up and waste the flowing of this ink over paper is the only release I embrace otherwise my thoughts will stay bottled up in my mind because every time I voice them, I get the same confused reactions Understanding me will require you to look deep into yourself and see through the facade to the stark reality of your own mortality and spirituality life is a precious commodity, but it’s lost something in the translation people don’t embrace the things they used to Love is a lie that people speak every day, I wonder who knows what it even is now there’s too many people who don’t know exactly what they want so they get someone with a little of this, and someone else... With a little of that: Love is 2 hearts beating as one, and when one misses a beat.... the other beats double-time until things work out Trust is a endangered species, teetering on the brink of extinction family and friends, things that used to mean much more than words now they mean just that: words. The respect people used to have for each other as a whole has disappeared under the enveloping shroud of envy, lust and greed I would sacrifice all earthly possessions to help someone truly in need The past for me is like a double headed demon: it hurt me then and continues to do so now. Why didn’t I listen to my mother’s advice? Now I’m a father, trying to raise a son in a world I don’t even want to be in what else can I teach him, but how to love his fellow man? How to stay true to what he believes in, no one else. That honesty is truly the best policy to apply at all times. I don’t wanna teach him wrong, but I’m not done learning myself that’s why I regret premarital sex more than anything else how can kids raise kids, it’s getting worse and worse they don’t know enough about life and themselves to properly educate a child on how to grow into a good person there are a few exceptions, I’m trying to be one myself hopefully I can rectify this thing I’ve done, I blame no one but myself Marriage... I won’t even go there.. Anyone who is happily married, you have my best wishes but generally, marriage is nothing but some word, empty promises, and free food I thought I had an angel, my life was heading in a new direction but though she can be warm and soft and so close at times.. At others she acts like we’re total strangers, and won’t tell me what’s on her mind. what the hell is this? Don’t tell me you want to make me happy and you love me and you won’t even open up to me...relationships should be like glass houses.. No secrets I’ve been feeling a tug lately on my soul, I know what I need to do I’m reaching one hand out towards God, but the devil has me held in two... I have to break the invisible chains and free myself from within but like trouble, it’s much easier to get into, then getting out of a life of sin What can I do, but withdraw once again into myself the only freedom I feel, is trapped in my own mind it’s the only place people don’t have hidden agenda’s and two-sided tongues how long can I survive this way, nothing to look forward to living my life like a machine, hollow, empty, yet full of life I’ll have to adapt to being alone, I know I’m not the only one I just can’t wait until the day, my demons and nightmares are gone Derrick H.