Black Poetry : Death Of A Complex

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by GYPSYMAN, Aug 13, 2001.

  1. GYPSYMAN

    GYPSYMAN Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Messages:
    592
    Likes Received:
    4
    Ratings:
    +5
    ...i remember snow fields
    crossed lonesome
    as a child
    my dog running ahead...
    bare winter trees
    reminding me,
    "life was no promise"
    youths imagination spurring
    my dreams on cold crisp
    clear
    cloudy visions
    of me
    as a man....

    i would peruse
    that "PLAN"
    frozen as
    ice covered branches
    locked in naivete
    asking "God" ?
    ...are you hearing me ?
    asking for success in life
    the finest wife
    the flyest home
    work for No Man !...only write
    in front of
    that huge fireplace
    in the mahogony library
    books
    from floor to ceiling
    even at that time
    feeling..the pressure
    of a "New Jersey community"
    of having to wear
    my brother's
    last year pair
    of pants plus
    construction boots
    BEFORE they were
    the "ish"
    ....and shirts
    never paid for but
    made for
    me
    on Mom's sewing machine
    from 1970's material...
    in the Eighties...well
    you probrably can tell
    from 6th grade up
    i caught hell...never ran
    home.... but
    I'd hit
    that stairwell
    to avoid the "snaps"
    soon learned ....to scrap
    HARD
    to redeem the self
    esteem loss
    the cost was compassion
    lost
    learned to use rage
    to fuel hate
    became a "lie in wait"
    specialist
    "Punch You in the Phuckin Face Quick"-club member
    plus I was "lite brite...**** near.."
    learned to swing
    BEFORE
    -the "white"
    got a chance
    to crack the air
    and make me
    cold as snow/hot as shame
    so began a young black males
    off the "PLAN"
    path-way
    to the land
    of ...............insanity...
    that is
    living life
    as
    OTHERS
    would have... me

    untill
    recently.

    as I grow
    to know
    ONE
    who I killed
    so long
    ago...
    I
    resurrect
    Self-Respect...

    ...and contemplate
    the

    Death



    of a Complex.



    On A Continuous Journey
    GYPSYMAN
     
  2. GQ

    GQ Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2001
    Messages:
    2,220
    Likes Received:
    3
    Occupation:
    United States Air Force
    Location:
    South Jersey
    Ratings:
    +3
    Outstanding flow GypsyMan!!!!

    Peace
    GQ
     
  3. GYPSYMAN

    GYPSYMAN Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Messages:
    592
    Likes Received:
    4
    Ratings:
    +5
    ..its good to laugh nowadays...

    Cindy...aint it good to look back now and laugh...most of the things I used to do was because of trying to hide what I had judged to be "unworthy" or not an attribute for those who are
    quote-unquote ...smoove....you know dat "hardrock"... wanted to be- "dat one" so bad...
    wasnt cool to let people know that..you were smart...or cared about certain shhh...HARD..HArd HARD...all the time.....till even now its so much a part of me ...I have to conciously catch myself from being a certain way, caused its so ingrained in a subtle way...its a deep area but as I work this multi-faceted area of ME
    with God's guidance...I am able to turn certain character defects into positive attributes...its a blessed and beautiful thing....especially to see it in your son or daughter and have the ability to help them overcome areas of difficulty where you yourself were running on selfwill with no guidance in the same ares as You grewup...follow me ??
    anyway Cin. thanks 4 the counter-Flow glad to know u was with me on this one.

    Peace
    g-man
     
  4. GYPSYMAN

    GYPSYMAN Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Messages:
    592
    Likes Received:
    4
    Ratings:
    +5
    Thanks GQ

    thanks 4 the read GQ..

    as alwayz
    i appreciate your input

    one
    g-man
     
  5. alyce

    alyce Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2001
    Messages:
    2,922
    Likes Received:
    83
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Counselor
    Location:
    mid-atlantic
    Ratings:
    +85
    oooh my....

    this is extremely real, Gypsyman! I appreciate your candor in this sensitive piece. You touch on many things here. I particularly appreciate your sharing a shade of Blackness not often considered when we think of color discrimination ~ because its origin is of the ugliest root ~ hatred among ourselves.

    Say it, Poet!

    a
     
  6. Da Street So'ja

    Da Street So'ja Banned MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2001
    Messages:
    7,648
    Likes Received:
    40
    Occupation:
    thrivin' spiritually/physically/emotionally/financ
    Location:
    where failure is not an option
    Ratings:
    +42
    GYPSY.......

    love the title dawg
    man dun
    you came a long way
    but that's what made
    you what you are today
    meaning a......

    MAN


    Peace
    DSSNY
     
  7. baller

    baller Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    Canada
    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2001
    Messages:
    3,759
    Likes Received:
    673
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    the near north
    Ratings:
    +836
    GYPSY...

    someTHINGS we laugh about. SOMEthings will never leave us. as we float in and out of who we were...trying to build who we are...we come to the realization that the road of LIFE is paved with many things...including PAIN. but, in the end, we rise above what we were to get to what we are. when we look back, we see that the PAIN wasn't so bad...and the things that stay with us are welcomed reminders of from whence we came.

    you laid this, GYPSY.
     
  8. GYPSYMAN

    GYPSYMAN Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2001
    Messages:
    592
    Likes Received:
    4
    Ratings:
    +5
    Thankyou Poets

    Cin- yes it is a good feeling to help my seeds in this way...or any youth that would take a suggestion for that matter ..my seeds and other youth I have a chance to influence are sometimes "listeners"..at other times they are learning the hard way...reminds me of somethin' my Moms used to say to me..."Hard head make a soft ***".... :laugh: thanks for the dialogue on this subject

    lovin life
    g-man

    ~A- No doubt discrimination amongst our own can be a hard pill to swallow growin' up ...I wanted to be pitch black growin' up..guess I thought it would solve my problems of feeling not quite 'a part of'..but as I grew up and aquired true homeboys of all shades ..I found out my dark-skinned partners wanted to be light ...and some of the brown skinned brothers wanted to be anything but what they were cause they felt TOO normal...main thing for me was I grew up in an adoptive family...all my brothers were blue-black ...so I didnt like stickin' out...my natural Pops was Cubano..my natural Mom was a brown skinned sistah...so I was alllllll phucked up...to say the least ...anyway, this subject is fuel for much dialogue...thanks for the feedback Alyce ...your input is highly valued.

    Peace
    g-man

    Soja- brother I am encouraged by the fact that you see growth in my drops..I believe I will remain satisfied with my own pieces -as long as I see GROWTH..thanks 4 the confirmation and encouragement.

    One !
    g-man

    Baller- I completely agree with what you said...You are right ...when I look back I see now...The Pain wasn't so bad...
    not to mention....Without Pain..there is no growth. thanks 4 the read and input.

    Peace
    g-man
     
Loading...